


I Will Never Give up on You

by AightImmaHeadOut



Series: I Will Never Give up on You [1]
Category: Death Note & Related Fandoms, Death Note (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alive Matt | Mail Jeevas & Mello | Mihael Keehl, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Engagement, Eventual Fluff, Fluff, Gang Rape, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Torture, Kidnapping, M/M, Multiple Endings, Near Death, Non-Graphic Rape/Non-Con, Plans For The Future, Psychological Torture, Rape Aftermath, Rape Recovery, Rape/Non-con Elements, Threats of Rape/Non-Con, Torture, Wedding Planning, Wedding Rings, bad and good ending, mello has anger issues, mello works with matt and the SPK, scary stuff, the SPK are like near's parents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-03
Updated: 2020-10-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:35:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 18
Words: 25,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24525493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AightImmaHeadOut/pseuds/AightImmaHeadOut
Summary: When Near goes missing, Mello must decide how far he's willing to go to bring him back home. But the clock is ticking, and it turn out it's some of Mello's past 'acquaintances' have some business with him.
Relationships: Mello | Mihael Keehl/Near | Nate River
Series: I Will Never Give up on You [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1772407
Comments: 58
Kudos: 53





	1. Planning

Near was happy. 

He never, not in a million years, would have thought that would ever be a way to describe himself. 

Life is unpredictable, isn't it? No one, no matter how much deductive skills they have, can predict what it has in store for you.

Not him.

Not Mello.

Not even L himself. 

The Kira case was over. The SPK made sure of that. Anthony, Stephen, and Halle were good people. Near has grown quite attached to them.

They had grown quite attached to Near as well, and had really grown to care. He was sure they were parental figures to him, because they should have left as soon as the Kira case was over. The three of them stuck around though, solving more cases and looking out for him. This was not part of their job, but Near was ok with that. 

He had also solved the case with Mello. He would have never solved it without Mello, really. Near was the one who pushed the first domino, making both Mello and L’s work topple. 

They both really are amazing.

Mello had given him more than he deserved. A friend. A lover. A companion. 

Near never thought he would be one engaging in love. Work was his priority, and with Kira around, who would have time for love?

But now Kira is gone, and he was not Near’s priority anymore, Mello is. Even if Mello is now working alongside Near, not against him, Near is still his top priority.

Not to beat him, but protect him.

Their relationship is intimate. One-sided love was out of the question. Each of them noticed the little things the other did to them. Making them more and more sure that this man is the one who they want to wake up next to for the rest of his life.

Near pulling an all nighter and waking up warm thanks to a fluffy blanket over him.

Mello having a hot cup of tea on his bedside in the morning.

Near having his hair played with, not by his hand but Mello’s.

Mello finally leaving the Mafia to put Near’s worries at ease.

Near waking up to breakfast on the counter.

Mello being warned to be careful on the road because he has someone waiting at home.

Back and forth, like a forever lasting game of tennis.

Near brings his attention to a ring on his left hand. Apparently, Halle was very picky about this one. Near was happy. A new priority.

It made him happy because it was now mandatory for them to spend more time with each other. It’s not like they don’t on a daily basis . It’s just that there’s an odd satisfaction of being guaranteed time with your lover.

It was troublesome though, because Mello would often get distracted, as he loved changing the subject. And kissing Near. And touching him. And whispering words sweet nothings into his ear. And - never mind. 

Near didn’t mind; they made sure they made even a little progress each day. It’s not like they had to rush. They both have all the time in the world, after all. 

A whap to the head caused Near’s train of thought to fade into oblivion.

Mello across from him, staring with wonder.

Usually, Near hates it when one ruins the time spent with himself, but it was his fault this time. They were supposed to be planning. Or unpacking, for the matter. Their house was slightly littered with empty packing cartons, labelled ‘Kitchen’, ‘Bedroom’, ‘Near’s (Stupid) Toys’.

Mello notices the smallest hint of a smile on the other man's face.

A raise of the blondes eyebrow caused Near to point out that he was the one getting distracted this time.

“I guess you're rubbing off on me more than I thought.” Near says with a smile.

Mello snickers.

“So? Got a problem with that, sheep?” he retorts.

“No, it’s just that we’ll never have a wedding this way.” Near reminds him softly

“Ah, shut up.” said Mello, stretching his overworked back from sitting in the same position too long. “It’s not my fault you look so annoying when you're focusing.” he complained.

“You were just saying yesterday that I look ‘annoying’ when I’m lost and thought as well.” Near pointed out. “Does me focusing also turn you on?”

Mello noticeably blushed. He was still not used to being caught off guard. He was used to being the boss, ordering people around.

He knew one thing for sure, though. Even though he did have it all, he was never happy.

But with Near… he would never speak to him that way.

If he even tried treating him the way he treated members of the Mafia, Near wouldn't endure it. He would give him one, two, three chances before leaving without a word. The SPK would kill him. It took a noticeably long time for the three to trust him, and Mello couldn’t blame them. After all, he was the one who pulled a gun on Near some time ago.

He also knew that Near wasn’t the ‘confront your problems head on type’. He’d just go.

Forgetting Mello. Leaving him alone.

Mello’s red face grimaced. One day, Near would be there, the next he’d be gone. He doesn’t want that to happen. Ever. 

If Near left him, where would he go? There was Matt, but he hadn’t seen him in a while. Going up to someone and asking for a place to stay? He had too much pride for that. Mello was scared. Scared to be weak. Scared to be alone. Scared to be -

Mello looks up, startled. Near, now playing with Mello’s hair beside him, looked down at him,

frowning. 

“I thought I told you not to think about that.” 

Mello inwardly cringed. He hadn’t been aware that he had been sitting down silently for that long. Near knew that, too. His persistence caused Mello to share his burdens with him. Near could barely believe what he was hearing at the time. 

Imagine. The leader of the Mafia (who had powers that no one could imagine) was scared of being alone. It took a lot of convincing, but Near had assured him that he had no intention of leaving. Then, anyway.

The smallest things trigger him sometimes.

Mello was never a thinker. Preferring to look before he leaps is his way of doing things. Near was right. They were rubbing off on each other.

Near broke the silence again.

“I’m not going anywhere, Mihael.”

A simple sentence that would be forever remembered.

Mello pounced; the action causing both men to fall, being sure to shield Near’s head from the impact of the floor.

Both males laid on the floor for a few seconds, Near processing the sudden movement.

Mello hid face into Near’s neck, carefully biting the inside of his cheeks.

He opened his mouth, but his voice cracked with emotions.

Near took the words out of his mouth, breaking the tension.

“Don't thank me. I’m always here for you. I love you ”

_ ‘But why?’ _

“Because you taught me what it’s like to love. You returned my feelings before I realized them myself. You put up with my idiotic persona. You came back for me to make a castle for the both of us. You came to work by my side, not against me. You swallowed your pride and apologized to the SPK. Hell, you even quit the Mafia as their leader for my safety, Mello. Mine. For that, and many more reasons, I love you. I love you, and I promise, I’m not going anywhere. You will officially be stuck with me. Do you hear me, Mihael?”

A nod. 

“Mello, I need you to tell me so i know you understand.”

A swallow, a deep breath, and a small whisper- 

“Yeah.”

Near let out a small, audible laugh. 

_ ‘Like the tinkling of bells.’  _ Mello thinks.

He realizes how lucky he is to have someone like Near. Anybody else wouldn’t deal with his shit for this long. He has so much patience, and would never lie, no matter what. Mello realizes he believes Near. He has no choice to. What’s love without trust, anyway?

It’s only then he breaks, and silently lets the tears fall.

  
  
  


Life is unpredictable, isn’t it?

  
  
  


So that’s why when Near disappeared only four days after, nobody expected it. 

  
  
  


No one heard him scream.


	2. Moon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Near thinks. That's it. That's all this chapters about.

The next few days went by swiftly. They were almost ready and all their hard work was beginning to pay off. As they continued to plan, Mello got in contact with Matt again, and Near talked with the SPK once more. 

They had all decided that Anthony would walk him down the aisle (he did feel a closer to him somehow), Halle would walk Mello down the aisle (Mello had no family, and Halle was the one who trusted him the most), Stephen would be Near’s best man (Near wanted him to be part of the ceremony as well), and Matt would be Mello’s (they were childhood friends after all. Near just hoped he wouldn’t get too drunk). 

Linda was coming too, with Mello’s protest. Roger had promised to be there and had even insisted on paying off a portion of the wedding, despite both Mello and Near’s reasoning.

“I did raise you after all.” he had said. He had. And he had done it very well.

The SPK were paying a part off as well. This pulled a load off both men. Weddings were expensive, no matter how much money you made. 

Their clothing was picked, and the tickets to the honeymoon were paid for. They were leaving three days after they were married, and staying there for two weeks. A fall wedding, they had decided. A nice cool breeze with colorful leaves will make a pretty picture.

Although both men were more busy these days and were too tired to talk at night, it didn't bother them. Results mattered, and this was the way to get the best one. Then, all they had to do was relax.

Mello was working overtime, trying to make extra money before the big day. Although this annoyed him, he was willing to do whatever it takes to make things easier on Near. Near appreciated this, but he really did wish that Mello would take better care of himself. Working hours at a time couldn’t be healthy, and Near found himself dragging Mello out of the office every night. 

Near looked at the time. It was a little past 10:00 at night, and Mello was still in the office. He did feel tempted to stop Mello once again, but he wasn’t sure Mello was ready to call it a night. 

Near felt restless somehow. The thought of the wedding in less than a month was really starting to get to him. It was an uncomfortable feeling, one that he wasn't used to. Looking out the window longingly, he stared. The moon was out today. 

Light.

A name wrongly pronounced by many. 

Kira.

A name people worshiped, protected.

Near shook his head.Maybe he just needed to get out of the house. It always seemed to help. 

He grabbed a warm coat to protect him against the chilly air. Although jeans weren’t the warmest thing to wear, it didn't matter. He wasn’t going to be out for long anyway. Opening the door to Mello's work space , he gently called out that he was going out for a bit, followed with a quick ‘love you’. Mello gave him a sound of acknowledgement, and Near went out the front door.

The gentle breeze hit him. Near locked the door and made his way down the steps. He walked on the side of the road, and let himself get lost in thought. He would be fine. His body had grown accustomed to this feeling and knew where to go.

His legs would take him up the hill behind the house that went down to the park which led him to the small field of owned land and would proceed to walk close to the lake where the water lapped against the shore until he was at the house again. Over and over until he was done thinking (or worrying, for the matter) and went home to where Mello was waiting. 

Near brought his attention up to the moon once again. Kira was something one wouldn’t ever forget whether he liked it or not. The moon flooded him with memories. 

He remembered being told that L was dead. He remembered Mello leaving abruptly, without so much as a jacket. He remembered Matt’s lost face before he left himself. 

He remembered carefully choosing the SPK members and working in their hideout. He remembered how most of them had died, leaving only four members of the organization.

He remembered hearing the news that Mello was dead and not believing it for a second. He was hoping, praying that he was alive. And he was. 

He remembered Matt bringing a bloody Mello to the hideout, begging, crying for him to let them in. Near has better medical skills than Matt, and Matt knows that. He knew he couldn’t take him to the hospital. They would call the police and... Matt knew he had to take him to Near, fully knowing the risk of being shot by the SPK. 

The risk of Near turning him away. 

The risk of burying Mello.  
But none of those things happened. Near tried to take them both in, but Matt had to leave - to make sure that they were safe. 

Near shiveres, trying to stop himself from thinking. But stopping one from thinking is next to impossible, if not impossible. So, he allows his mind to carry on.

He remembered treating Mello’s. He knew right away that the skin would never heal perfectly. The wound went down one half of his face, to his left arm, and the side of his back. His scalp was burned, causing Near to shave off half his hair. His left eye would never be the same, due to the light of the explosion.

Near never knew that he would have to ever treat a wound that large. No one should. He was only 18 after all, and it didn’t help that he was shouldering this man’s life. It didn’t help that he knew Mello and cared for him. It didn’t help that the SPK weren’t exactly on the best terms with him. 

Near had used too much supplies, and even then, Mello wouldn’t wake up. 

He was fading away.

Every day, Near would have to change the bandages, apply more gauze, put on ointments so the wounds wouldn’t get infected, and then wrap him up in bandages again. Near wouldn’t sleep, watching Mello. 

Two weeks passed. Near remembered feeling the presence of Mello waking up for the first time. He was scared to look, to see what he made him become. It took several minutes of convincing himself to end the inner turmoil. 

Near opened his eyes. His breath caught in his throat. 

Mello wasn’t there.

He was staring at nothing. His eyes were blank, as if they just saw death itself. And he was talking. Talking about the explosion, to the Mafia, to Soichiro Yagami, to Matt, insisting he was fine, talking to - Near? 

Near couldn’t believe it. Mello was apologizing.

Near remembered his eyes widening. Mello saw him as a rival, another obstacle to overcome. He hated Near, but he hadn’t done anything to him other than name calling and such.

Why the hell should he be apologizing to him?

Everything Mello was saying didn’t make sense. He was blubbering about how at Wammys, he had beat him and watched him cry. How he had tormented him just because he was better.

This never happened though. Mello was simply creating meaningless scenarios in his head. 

Near wanted to hug him, to comfort him and tell him it would be ok, that he would always be someone to turn to if he needed him.

But Near was too cowardly for any of these things. The only action he was brave enough to perform was holding his scarred hand, but even then Near was terrified of hurting him any more than he already has.

Near gently rubbed his thumbs over the burnt skin. He remembered cooing at Mello that he did forgive him, while silently begging God to let his mind rest, and focus on him instead of the pain.  
Near remembered Mello speaking so clearly then, and he had said

“Near, Near, do you forgive me?”

Near was surprised. He hadn’t been able to understand him for several minutes, and yet…

“Of course, Mello. I will always forgive you.” he had whispered.

“I love you, Near.”

Mello, despite his obvious exhaustion, raised his right arm and placed it on Near’s cheek. Urging him to come closer.

Their lips touched for the first time. It was a beautiful feeling. So fleeting, light. 

Near’s memories were fuzzy after the kiss. He couldn’t remember how they had stopped, or how he had woken up by the SPK on Mello’s bed with only him on it. 

The SPK were furious. Mello, despite all his wounds, had managed to escape the hideout. They couldn’t help but remind Near of how much supplies they had ‘wasted’ without so much more than a thank you.

Near wasn’t mad though. He was disappointed. He had left. Maybe that was his punishment for being selfish. Kissing him in a half conscious state was disgusting.

He was 64% sure that Mello had in fact, remembered what happened that night. Mello would be coming back, he knew that for a fact. His photograph is something he would want for himself. 

Their meeting a few weeks later resulted in a gun at Near’s head, and that made him 93% sure that Mello very well knew that they had kissed each other. The other 7% will only be confirmed if Mello told him himself and it still bothers Near to this day, as Mello would never swallow his pride to tell Near that he did remember something like that. 

He did want the answer to everything, but asking Mello was out of the question. 

Near stopped walking. 93% was pretty good. Really good, in fact, because Near found that 5% of evidence was a lot for work and such. He still wondered how he had got to where he was in the first place. He was so, so happy to be marrying someone like Mello.

Near was almost out of the park. He contemplated turning around to go to take the short way back home, but he decided he wanted to go around one more time to enjoy the scenery of his home. 

Near looked up. The stars really did complement the moon. Near took out his phone and snapped a picture with a smile. The sky was almost purple, and Mello always liked peaceful things. Near shoved his phone in his pocket. He would show Mello when he got home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)


	3. Paranoria

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mello stumbles through an empty hallway

When Mello finally looked up from the screen, his eyes were flashing from sitting two inches away from his computer too long. Sighing, he shut off the contraption and allowed his exhausted eyes to get used to the dimness of the office. His attention came to rest on the lukewarm cup of coffee that Near had left who knows how long before. Picking up the mug, he staggered out of the cramped room and made his way through the darkness.

How stupid he must of looked. A tired man carrying a mug and stumbling his way through a dark hallway at night. Near surely would laugh.

Or, you know, have a heart attack, because anyone stumbling through the dark would be scary.

Putting the mug in the sink and making his way up stairs, he contemplated showering, at this late hour. Or maybe have a midnight snack. 

Of chocolate OR Near. 

A shower. Definitely a shower. 

He was just too tired. He wished he was in their hotel bedroom right now, spooning him, without giving anyone else a second thought. Just him and his husband. 

It was all worth it though. They were gonna to be so happy. 

Mello stepped in the shower and allowed his eyes to close as the hot water pounded on his skin. He liked long showers. They were comforting to life, stressful or not. Things were so much easier when he turned his life around. Near was always right. Why didn't he listen to him to begin with?

After about thirty minutes, Mello got out of the shower and dried his long, blonde hair with his towel. Walking quietly to the bedroom, he put on a clean pair of boxers and a comfy shirt. He turned around to turn off the light.

The bed was empty.

Why was it empty?

That’s when it hit him. 

Why hadn’t Near been laughing or having a heart attack from Mello’s presence?

Why hadn’t Near been the one to drag Mello out of his office for bed?

Why hadn’t they been showering together, or cuddling in bed?

Mello was about to act, grab his coat, call Near’s cell.

‘I’ll be out for a bit. I’ll be back soon, I love you.’

Mello slowly relaxed. His heart seemed to be beating a mile a minute from the shock. 

Now he remembered. Near had gone out for a night walk. The breeze helps him clear his head, he had said. 

He wished he could’ve gone too. It would have been romantic, and they could’ve shared their worries about their future. He could use a little head-clearing.

Too bad he had been too engrossed in his precious work.

A part of Mello wanted to defend himself, saying that this was the only way to make things work. That it was important so Near himself wouldn’t be pulling his hair out in frustration.

But another part was cursing himself, letting a window of opportunity fly by thanks to his stubbornness. Why hadn’t he listened, really listened before?

Mello hated himself for being distant lately. At this point, he was tempted to kick himself.

Fine. It was decided. 

He would make it up to him tomorrow, double the ‘attention’.

Mello smirked to himself at the thought, and climbed into bed, ready for a peaceful sleep.

Something didn’t feel right though.

He tossed and turned for several minutes, rolling this way and that. Something didn’t sit right with him. But he didn’t know what? 

Ok, now he sounded over-overanxious. And crazy.

Maybe the oven was on or something. No, when he put the cup in the sink, he would’ve seen it. 

Maybe the door wasn’t locked. No, Mello knew Near would never dream of keeping it unlocked.

Maybe, maybe…

What is wrong with him? Why was he suddenly so paranoid in a place that was home?   
He had never once felt like this here. It was only in his Mafia days that he knew he would spend half the night awake. 

It felt like the day before the explosion. 

He didn’t understand. One minute, he was dragging his tired ass out of the office, and the next he was staying awake like a child who heard a sudden noise at night. 

Why, why, why?

Why did he feel like he needed to do something? He had slept without Near on the rough nights where he had to spend the night at the SPK for work. 

Why did he feel the need to wait until Near came home? He was an adult, not a child. He was L’s successor, for god's sake!

That’s it. Mello was now forcing himself to go to sleep. It seemed like every fiber of his body would do anything but, though.

‘You should check the time.’ ‘ You should call Near’ ‘Make sure you turned off the computer properly’ ‘Call Near, ask when is he coming home’ ‘We still need to do work.’ ‘Just check the time see how much hours of sleep you missed’ ‘Maybe you should just get up, read a book’

“Shut up.” Mello groanes out loud into his pillow. 

He had definitely confirmed his suspicions now. He really was paranoid and crazy.

He was already sick of this. Why the hell was his mind telling him to wake up? 

Shutting out his eyes tightly, Mello forces his body to shut down. 

When he wakes up, Mello feels groggy. He wants to go back to bed. He doesn’t get up though. His stomach is doing flips. Something was definitely wrong. 

And he knows exactly why now. 

Mello slowly turns around, praying that he’s wrong. Praying that he’s just paranoid, and nothing more. 

No ones there. 

Mello reaches hesitant hand to the spot on the bed.  
It’s cold.

Mello pulls his hand back as if the bed burned him. His heart was beginning to beat again. He was definitely awake now.

Mello throws back the covers and begins to rush downstairs. His mind is already jumping to conclusions. He tries to keep a calm mind, to think things through. Though he wants to get the answer immediately, Mello finds himself hesitating on the last step of the stairs. 

Mello quietly calls his lover’s name. As if he’s a child that is supposed to say quiet while his parents are talking. As if he'll wake up someone sleeping.

But there is no one to wake up. Since he wasn’t in bed, that means he has to be downstairs somewhere. 

Right?

Creeping into the kitchen, Mello calls his name again. And again. And again.

The kitchen is empty. It is cold and quiet and lifeless.

No coffee brewing or breakfast still hot on their plates. No ‘good morning’, nothing.

Mello snaps. 

He runs around the house frantically, thoroughly checking first the bottom floor, then the basement, then the top floor. He searches and searches, and keeps searching because he has to be in the house somewhere, right?

Mello finds himself calling the other by his real name. Because he would surely answer that. By then he was desperate. He rips the closet by the door open, not because he’s hoping that he is in there but because he is checking to see if-

His shoes were gone. His coat isn’t there either.

Nate River had never come home.

Mello grabs his coat and sprints down the door without bothering to lock it behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> plot twist nears just watching porn or something


	4. Something More

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mello is in denial.

Mello will not sleep. 

He had spent a little over an hour looking, calling out his name out on the streets. 

Why hasn’t he shown up yet? Mello had made sure to check all the places he was sure Near was. The quiet spot in the forests, small trails that were more or less vacant. Places that were more private, and the type that you just happened to find out of chance. 

It didn’t help that Mello had to search on foot, because the places Near was most likely to be couldn’t be accessed in a car. It didn’t help that Mello was panicking, and it made it harder for him to not lose his head. It didn’t help that it was still dawn, meaning there were almost no passerbys, and there was no way they had seen him.

Mello ran, his legs strong underneath him. He was going to find him. 

But he didn’t. 

He wasn’t anywhere. It’s as if he had disappeared off the face of the earth. Mello wouldn’t be surprised if the entire world had forgotten too. Maybe he never existed in the first place. 

Excuses. He just wanted a reason for him not to be missing. He was not going to accept this.   
He was going to find Near by any means necessary.

Mello slowed down, breathing noticeably hard. The sun was beginning to come up, and morning people were beginning to come out of their houses for a jog. Mello started to run again. 

What else could he do? Wait? 

Hell no. That wasn’t Mello. He wasn’t just going to sit around on the slightest chance that he was in trouble. He knew that Near would do the same as well. Perhaps he wouldn’t start by running around town, but he would worry, and act.

Mello slowed down once again. This wasn’t getting him anywhere. He didn’t even know what trail Near went on that night. 

Why didn’t he listen? Why didn’t he give one second to look up from his damn work to look at his fiancee? If he thought about Near for just a second, he could’ve…

Mello’s eyes were burning. This could have been prevented. He could've protected him.

Continuing his search less slowly now, he made his way down a small path away from the public. The lump in his throat was almost impossible to swallow. 

How was he supposed to run when he could barely breathe? 

He analyzed the environment around him. He knew where he was. 

Him and Near had walked here together a few times. It was before they got their house. 

Mello remembered. It was one of their first dates, and Mello had spent the whole day with Near.

It was around midnight that they found this trail. They had both agreed to use up the last half hour somewhere quiet, after all the chaos from earlier. The trail was unused, but it did appear to have some prints from previous people. Silence consumed them, yet it didn’t feel awkward. They felt relaxed somehow. 

Although, who wouldn’t? The trees made soft rustling noises as the gentle breeze ran through the leaves. Their feet made soft noises from the small twigs. Their even breath made small clouds in the air. The moon had shone brightly from underneath the branches. 

Neither of them had any intention of breaking the fragile spell, but why take chances, right? So they stayed silent. 

Ironically, the best thing that happened was when they had to say goodbye. 

After spending the whole day together, neither of them wanted to leave. But Near was getting picked up by Gevanni soon, so they had to separate whether they liked it or not. 

Awkward goodbyes, tight hugs, flirting.

A kiss. That’s what he wanted. Even after Mello had admitted his feelings and Near had felt the same way, their conversations were kept professional. 

And Mello hated it.

He wanted something more. Today. Before Near was out of his arms once again.

Mello acted on impulse. 

One minute they were looking for Near’s ride, the next they were kissing under the stars. 

Near stiffened with surprise, and Mello couldn’t blame him. Hell, he had surprised himself. He had just wanted to make that dream a reality, so he did. That’s all there is to it. 

To Mello’s relief, Near had kissed back. It was pure, and compassionate, and intimate.

Mello was in love. Not just some stupid gradeschool crush, or a college fling, but actualy love.

Then that stupid Gevanni ruined it all. 

He had seen them, and had proceeded to honk his horn for a full three second before stopping. 

The spell was broken. Near had pushed himself away from Mello, murmuring a quick goodbye. His cheeks were crimson as he ran to the car where Mello saw what he assumed was a lecture from his co-worker. Mello had called Matt to tell him everything and then....

As Mello’s mind was taken back to the harsh reality, his eyes came to focus on a small piece of….something. 

Wait… Mello knew what that was. 

There was no possible way. 

As he walked towards the object, the tears threatened to spill over.

Going on one knee, he began pushing away small sticks and bits of leaves, Mello’s heart stopped as he confirmed his theory.

With his gloved leather hand, grasped the handheld article. It was cold. His deductive skills reasoned that it had been here for at least a couple hours, maybe more.

But that couldn’t be. His suspicions couldn’t be correct. He was second, he couldn’t be right.

Pressing the button, the cracked surface flashed a picture of Mello himself. 

Tears ran down his face.

In Mello’s hand, was a phone with a cracked screen that had previously belonged to Near.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> funny story, i put the story in the chapter summary and spent 15 minutes shortening before i realized what i did. Im so stupid sometimes :)


	5. Matt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> mello calls matt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry, recently i accidently deleted this chapter for who knows how long. sorry for the confusion!

“Calm down, Mells. Take a BREATH, dude, and say it again. Slowly.”

As soon as Mello found that incriminating piece of evidence, he ran home and called Matt before he had taken off his shoes.

Saying Mello was a mess was an understatement. He looked disgusting. And considering Mello liked to keep his appearance in check, it looked about 10x worse then how any person would look at him. 

“I don’t know what to do, Matt. The day is half over, and he still hasn’t come home. He should be home, Matt, but he isn’t. Look at me!” Mello yelled, ignoring the fact that Matt wasn’t, um, present at that very moment in time. “I’m looking at myself in the mirror and I am disgusted by this reflection! Absolutely disgusted, Matt! If I had bothered to leave my fucking stupidity behind at Wammys, maybe I could have learned a thing or two from him! And- and- and now that he’s fucking gone-”

Mello’s voice cracked. He was going to start sobbing again, and sound pathetic.

Matt’s voice spoke up from the other end.

“Woah, Mello. Blaming yourself again? Look- I mean, um, listen. I’m driving over there right now, and I’ll, I don’t know cook something for you or something. Once you’ve gotten something into your system, ESPECIALLY CHOCOLATE, we’ll talk and figure something out. For now, just give yourself some 15 minute self-pampering and fix yourself back up. That way, I won’t think some homeless person attacked you, or something.” Matt said jokingly. 

Mello had to stifle a laugh. Matt got louder with each syllable, which was ridiculous on it’s own, but they both knew Matt couldn’t cook for a pig, much less for a picky eater like him. He was right though. He did need to eat, and keeling over did NOT sound like such a good idea.

Mello swore he heard a car horn blare through the phone along with tires screeching and cursing.

“Shit. Sorry Mells, but that’s my third time running through a red light in this conversation, and it’s not like I’m going over the speed limit or anything. Guess old habits really do die hard. Bye, Mello! I’ll be there soon.”

As Mello hung up the phone, the bitter feeling had gone away slightly. Looking at himself in the mirror, he decided there was a lot to do. At least he had stopped crying. 

Eye drops would help. He knew there were some somewhere. 

Finally taking off his shoes and coat, Mello paced around the house for a few minutes before recovering the unused eye drops from the bathroom. 

Using them quickly, he started to clean the house, fluffing pillows, taking stuff off the floor, and making the unfixed bed. Going to the kitchen, Mello opened the fridge to find something to eat. It was safe to assume Matt was eating with him because he had always loved Near’s homemade cooking. Mostly because he could burn water, but that's besides the point. Mello took a casserole that the SPK had made them and put it in the oven to reheat. 

Fiddling with his phone, Mello did whatever he could to make himself escape reality for a bit. Something was bothering him though. 

How was he supposed to tell the SPK that Near had gone missing?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> brophes


	6. Copper-Toed Boots

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He must analyze the situation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! i love weekends, don't you?

It was cold. So, so cold.

His head hurt from the impact. 

When Near’s eyes finally opened, he was on a cold stone floor. His eyes hurt just by opening them. Why did he feel like crap?

Analyze. Gotta analyze. Focus.

Near’s head was spinning though. And when one's head is spinning, it is very difficult to concentrate.

One at a time.

Near looked at himself. There were thick ropes wrapped around his hands and ankles, already bruising by being tied so tight. No one could ever bite their way through these. Even with a small blade, you would have to cut for many hours to get free. But this was not the thing that had caught his attention. 

Near was naked. All that was left was a tattered blanket over him. It had a revolting smell, and he was sure they had done it on purpose. But who was ‘they’? 

Near knew better than to call out for help. He was 95% sure that no one would come, at least not right away. There was no gag in his mouth, which means the kidnapper wasn’t worried about being heard. Judging by the dim light and hard floor, Near assumed he was in an underground shelter of some sort.

The person had him stripped down, which means they were worried of Near hiding a weapon. But most people leave their clothes on after you search. 

This wasn’t adding up. Unless…

Tracking devices. But most people don’t worry about tracking devices. Not many people carry them around this day in age, unless you're an overprotective parent worrying about a child.

But Near wasn’t a child, and he had matured enough that he looked like an adult. 

Which means they know him. And Near most likely knows them too.

That would be the worst case scenario. If someone knew who he was, then they most likely knew about his lifestyle and his occupation. They also probably know that he is a prodigy and would take extra precautions when handling him.

That would explain the stripping.

But who did he, what was the term that Matt used, have ‘beef’ with?

He was always the introvert type, never playing with the children at Wammys House because he preferred to be alone. Even though his social circle had widened quite a bit with Mello’s group, he had never gotten too involved to the point of upsetting anyone to this level.

Had he? Mello certainly did get into a lot a fights but that had nothing to do with-

Oh. 

That’s when it hit him. Near was always part of the police, stretching the law, but always staying within those boundaries. Mello, on the other hand, had gone past those lines, and was a known criminal to Japan. 

But when the two of them had started working together, they were soon looked at as one person. Mello also had to give up a lot when he got together with Near. He now had an idea who this ‘mystery person’ was.

But why would they kidnap him, instead of Mello?

Most importantly, what had happened to get him in this situation?

Think, Nate.

Ok. He recalled walking along the path and had just taken a picture for Mello. After walking, he came to the private trail. He had felt eyes on his back, as well as quiet footsteps behind him. Near ignored them at first, but that’s when he noticed he felt - off. 

Although he didn’t turn around, Near could very well analyze the situation with no eyes. The pace of their steps was what helped him the most. Every few minutes the other person had quickened their pace by a few steps, then went back to normal. It was obvious it had some business with him.

He was in a secluded place at the wrong time. Near finally chose to turn around when the steps quickened for a few seconds longer. They felt heavier, and before Near knew it, he was face to face with a man in a coat, their eyes hidden by the hood. Time stopped for only a second before Near was hit in the head with a blunt object. No wonder his head was pounding. The only thing he was sure of was that the person was a man, due to their broad shoulders and choice of coat. He was also quite sure that the thing that had hit him was metal. 

Mello. Law. L. Kira. Kidnapping. 

He knew who it was, he was sure of it . No wonder they had chosen him. He was simply bait.  
Near was pissed, but at the same time happy. He had outsmarted them in only his first waking. 

Footsteps behind Near snapped him out of his thoughts. Although he was facing away from the figure, Near was able to see the shadow that lurked on the wall in front of him. He decided to test his theory on who the hell this was.

“It’s been awhile, Dwight.”

The way the figure hesitated confirmed that he was right. Near smirked. No way.

Near watched as more and more shadows crept up on the wall. There were definitely more than 10 people on the wall, and with their shadows clumped together like that, it looked like a shapeless blob.

Although they were whispering, Near knew right away that they were all male. He decided to catch them off guard again.

Addressing the men one by one by their real names gave him reactions. Thank goodness he read and memorized their files. Unfortunately, the downside of this was that it did not sit right with one of the men, resulting in a kick to Near’s torso.

The force of the impact caused his naked body to roll over, facing them for the first time. The blanket had managed to stay twisted on to his skin, thankfully covering his lower half. 

Normally, Near wouldn’t mind being kicked -he had expected at least one person to inflict damage on him- but the one who had kicked him was the man with the copper-toed boots, so it hurt way more than it should have.

Near ignored the pain on his body to take a good look at each of the men standing in front of him.

They looked pissed. Near swears he could see the gears inside their small head’s of theirs. They knew they needed to settle who is in charge in this room. After all, it wasn’t Near who kidnapped them.

Near could see the humiliation of being outsmarted by their victim growing on their face.   
Now, some might say that if he really is a prodigy, he wouldn’t test their patience because he was a prisoner that is vulnerable and weak. Their prisoner, that could kill him at any given moment. 

Near was only being cocky because he knew for fact that they definitely would not kill him. Why? Because they needed him for something, and one would not kill someone he needs. These people were not the type to plan their ‘punishments’ beforehand, as their best ideas came to them in flashes.

Some of them. For example, at this time, they were too flustered to do anything. The one who had kicked him simply reacted on impulse and now could not think of a way to answer to Near’s cockiness. 

Some would say that the situation was awkward. Near had to bite his tongue to keep himself from smirking. He knew there was a line that was yet to be drawn, so he needed to know when to stop. He surely didn’t want to be kicked again.

But still. The way they gawked at him was pathetic and ridiculous all on its own, but the way they opened and closed their mouths in a desperate attempt to form a sentence was laughable. They were getting more and more annoyed as the seconds ticked by. They were supposed to be better than him.

Dwight Gordon, AKA Rod Ross, was staring down at him with a look of pure disgust and hatred along with the rest of the supposedly dead Mafia.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haven't seen near in a while have we? miss him?


	7. Cell Phones

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, so sorry for the late chapter. For some reason, my computer was being all annoying recently... anyway, please enjoy!!

After Matt took a big L when he burned water, Mello decided it was easier for him to do all the work. He had seriously expected Matt not to take him seriously and start playing games as usual, but this time he sat in the chair with his leg bouncing up and down slightly.

Mello had managed to calm himself down enough that he was functioning properly and was able to work in the kitchen without hurting himself. When Matt arrived, he had brought a large amount of convenience store chocolate bars with him. His grocery bag was also complete with more eye drops, tea bags, and small snacks. 

God, he loved him.

The scent of tea delicately filled the room. Both men were sitting across from each other at the table. Mello unwrapped a chocolate bar and bit into it hesitantly as Matt patiently waited for Mello to gather his thoughts. 

Taking a deep breath, Mello explained every little detail to Matt. It was very hard at first, but as soon as he started, the words flowed out so quickly that they would get jumbled every once in a while and he’d have to start again.

Matt listened carefully, while hacking into Near’s phone to see if there was any evidence about his mysterious disappearance. He had to admit, he too had a funny feeling about this whole thing. Normally, he would’ve convinced Mello to sit back and wait, play a video game or two, but not this time. Something told him that Near was on a time limit. And that scared shitless. 

He knew shouldn’t be worried. Everything Mello was saying had a logical explanation. And yet…

The homescreen on Near’s phone showed. They got in. 

It was heartbreaking. Near had set a picture of himself and Mello. In the picture, they were standing at a carnival of some sort, judging from the many people in the background. Mello was taking the selfie, and was winking playfully at the camera with Near looking a bit overwhelmed, but you could still see his eyes sparkling with a natural small smile on his face. 

Matt could see his best friend’s change of expression when he saw it. His face obviously tightened into a tight knot. Mello looked like he was about to cry again. Matt turned his attention to the phone again. Looking at the history of Near’s activity, he saw that the last thing that he had done on his phone was go on the camera app. He had taken a photo of the night sky.

11:32

So far, this was the only piece of evidence. He had disappeared not long after 11:32. Mello was looking at the picture, searching for a sign of struggle, anything. The picture didn’t appear to be taken from another side of a window. It was also too clear to be deliberately taken for a sign. So this was before he got taken away. But Mello had found the phone on another trail. Calculating, Mello decided it would take approximately 15-20 minutes to get to the trail it was found on. 

Either Near got kidnapped on the trail or his kidnappers decided to plant the phone there to mislead them.

Shit. They had hit a roadblock.

No..! This isn’t the time. Near needed him. Think. Think…!

The phone was cracked. Most people would assume that the phone was already broken, but even so, you would take it just in case. But the phone was here and it had been hidden under a few sticks and dirt. If it had been planted somewhere, why would you try to hide it? The point was for it to be found. 

So, in other words, there was a very good chance that the kidnappers didn’t know the phone had existed in the first place. And that doesn’t harm the evidence of Near being taken at or after 11:32. Ok. This was good. There was still something to work with. 

Matt spoke up. This had been bothering him for a while. 

“Um, Mello? Look, I know you're thinking right now and I would hate to add things to your plate, but, um, have you…?”

It took Mello a few seconds to process this. How was he supposed to know- oh. 

Oh. 

The SPK. 

It was no surprise that Matt thought of this as well. Him and Near got along well despite their positions and interests. They would spend many enjoyable hours doing their own things without saying a word. This was how they got to know each other. 

Matt also had a hard time getting along with the SPK at first. Matt was Mello’s best friend and right hand man after all. It didn’t help at all that he was socially awkward, so it took twice the amount of effort to get on their good side. 

Mello didn’t want to. He really didn’t want to call them now. Or ever, for the matter. 

They would honestly kill him. Mello knew that they did care about Near despite his peculiar attitude at first, but he trusted them so much that he had decided to drop the emotionless facade and get to know them better. 

The SPK had given Mello warnings that they would not hesitate to kill him if he did anything to Near. But Mello didn’t do anything to him. 

He just wasn’t able to protect him.

Mello knew full well that they could very much kill him. He was outnumbered, and they were physically stronger than him. He also doubted that they would give him a chance to tell the story, much less give him a second chance. 

But there was no time. There was no way they could do this in secret. They needed allies, and the SPK were the only ones they could trust. Maybe not the other way around, but... 

Mello took out his phone.

“I’ll try to get a hold of them. But there is a very good chance that they want to do their own investigation. That would mean they would keep information from us, and even do rash actions. The worst case scenario is that they kill us ourselves.” Mello says (half) jokingly.

Matt gave him a crooked smile. 

“Give yourself some privacy, man. I’ll try to find some more proof to help us.”

Flashing him a grateful look, Mello made his way to another room, away from the warm kitchen.

“Hey Mello?”

He turned around again. 

“Good luck. You're gonna need it.”

Mello’s heart began to beat faster as he looked at the contact name on the screen. Pressing it, his phone vibrated in his hand.

Once. 

Twice.

Three tim-

It stopped. 

“Hello?”

Lidner. It was Lidner. Mello didn’t know if he was relieved or terrified that this was the one he was breaking the news to.

He took a deep breath, opened his mouth and-   
He told. He told her everything. From the paranoia alone, to finding the phone, to calling Matt.

The result was...

Devastating.

Lidner yelled and screamed every single insult a curse you could imagine. Saying how she couldn’t believe that she trusted him. How she gave him a chance. How Mello had put Near’s life in danger just by working with him alone. 

The noise caused the other two SPK members to investigate, and soon, they were yelling at him too. Mello desperately tried to calm them down. It took a long, long time, but they finally were quiet enough to explain that he was working hard. That killing him wasn’t such a good idea, because they needed everything they had. 

‘It’s just what the kidnappers want’ he had said. 

Mello told them that if they start their own investigation, they wouldn’t have Near’s phone and wouldn’t have anything to work on. 

Yes. He was bribing them, but it was the only thing he could do. He told them he wanted to find Near as much as they did because he loved him more than anything. 

They hung up.

Mello felt horrible. It was a lost cause. He failed again. He wanted to cry, and rest his eyes. 

Until his phone vibrated with a notification.

‘We’ll be there in 15’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a little rush but at least it's done!


	8. Reins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: This chapter has some pretty fucked up content. Mentions of sex.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> enjoy...

Near stared at Rod. Rod stared back.

A hard, cold stare of hatred. Rod stared with hatred because he wasn’t the boss, not anymore. Near could almost feel the itching desperation to turn the tables. The fear of his anger reflected off the other members. They felt the need to do something but feared to add the raging fire.

And all of this Near could feel by analyzing. Much like Mello, they couldn’t stop themselves from engaging in the action. This group worked with Mello for a long time, and his personality rubbed off on them more than they would’ve liked. Near was going to use that to his advantage as much as possible.

Near is not an emotionless robot. He is a human, and he has emotion as all humans do. The emotion he was feeling right now…

Was pure disgust. Not fear, or annoyance, or pride, but disgust.

He hated himself for using Mello as an example to deal with the situation. It was disgusting. He wanted to kick himself for even thinking about it. Perhaps Rod would do it for him. He just hoped Mello would forgive him.

Near didn’t even know what time it was. The hideout was dim and blocked out every single ounce of the sky. He could’ve been missing for hours, minutes, or even seconds. He didn’t know. Near was as blind as the mice with no tails.

He hoped Mello wouldn’t do anything rash. He hoped that the SPK would be willing to work with him. He hoped that he wouldn’t panic.

He hoped that he would find him soon.

It’ll be okay. Mello was smart, and with little guidance, Near trusted he would keep his head.  
Near would have to have faith in Mello, as well as do his part here. Survive. Keep a cool head.

As well as his sanity. He refused to let someone so pathetic take everything away from him.

Near separated himself from his thoughts once more. Rod was still standing in front of him, hands clenched into tight fists. For a split second, Near swore that he saw his eyes flick toward the poor excuse for a blanket wrapped around his bottom.

_‘What was that look for, Rod? Think of a way to punish me yet?’_

Rod continued to stare. He had unclenched his fists and his furious expression changed to something else. Did it look... satisfied? Why did he look so happy with himself?

_‘It was sudden, as well. What exactly are you planning?’_

Even the other gang members looked at him in confusion. Near suddenly felt uncomfortable. He couldn’t be planning something that bad...right? They needed him. They would not kill him. They would use him for his brains. Unless.

Unless he miscalculated. Maybe they didn’t need his brains. Maybe… maybe he was 100% bait and nothing more. It was possible that they didn’t need his brains at all.

Rod stepped closer to Near, his steps echoing until he was stepping on the blanket. Squatting, he reached. Near prepared himself for any sudden movement. A swing to the face, choking, anything. Even he did not expect what Rod’s next move was. Sitting Near up, he untied the thick ropes from his hands and feet.

Near’s eyes widened. What the hell? The rest of the Mafia looked like their eyes were going to pop out of their heads. They began to protest, but one glare from their boss immediately caused their efforts to wilt. Now free, Near immediately rubbed his wrists with his aching hands.  
Rod spoke.

“Shut up, all of you. Now listen, you will do what I say, and one word from any of you will go home with a bullet in their goddamn skull. Understood?”

It seemed like every single one of the men gulped at the same time before they nodded hesitantly. Rod turned to his men once more. He knew Near couldn’t see his face. He smirked at his partners.

“Besides, it’s way more fun when they struggle.”

In one swift movement, Near was in the air with a hand to his throat. The blanket fell to the floor. Near’s hands instinctively rose to the iron-like grip on his neck. He couldn’t help fighting back even though he knew he would never escape. Clawing at his hands only made the grip tighter as less air managed to make their way out of his lungs.

Near felt panic flowing through his whole body. Never before had he been this close to passing out. He couldn’t feel the floor under his feet and he started to feel light headed. The cheers of the other members began to get more muffled as he sank further and further into oblivion. He was going to faint. He was going to die.

That’s what he thought. Like a light switch, Rod’s grip loosened, and Near’s body fell to the floor, gasping and coughing, struggling to let as much air in his lungs as possible. His throat already felt sore and his senses were coming back to him. Near heard a collection of groans come from the remaining men.

“Your turn.” was all Rod said.

A few seconds of silence. And then more roars of cheers. It seemed like the other members pounced on him. The next few minutes were horrifying. The rest of the mafia kicked, choked, and beat the small body. This made Near realize that they were completely and utterly insane. Rod had the reigns of all the men here. Without his judgment, his rules, someone to keep them in check, they were more dangerous then Mello and the police themselves.

He was getting passed from person to person like a rag doll. They took turns choking him, barley giving Near time to force more air in his lungs. He was sure they would accidentally (or purposefully) kill him either by a hit to the head or suffocation. He actually contemplated faking his death so that Rod could kill all of them on impulse or make them all run to a different state.

He was getting choked when one of the other members retorted “Woah, there people. Be careful, or else we’ll ruin his beautiful, slender, legs.” The men burst out laughing.

Disgusting. Absolutely disgusting. Near felt sick to his stomach. Men were laughing from every angle of his body, watching him twitch and squirm and struggle.

“Hey Boss, let’s make money off this fucking albino. Maybe someone out there will pay to fuck a 12 year old.” More laughter.

“People will pay for anything, Jack. They’ll fuck anything, too. I say we try it. Maybe he’ll earn his lesson of being a smart ass. It’ll make him talk.” More and more laughter.

What? There was no way. No fucking way. They knew he had no intention of talking about whatever they wanted to begin with. They knew they had to break him first. Near was too cocky. He had made a mistake. He should’ve never let them off their reigns.

Their best ideas come in impulses. They just need to get worked up to get them quicker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Summers here! Updates soon. This chapter has been delayed for so long!


	9. Fairytale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mello can't sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello people! Hope you have a great day.

The hideout was a mess. Despite its enormous space, it was covered in documents with many parts to them. 

Mello was pulling his third all-nighter in a row and Matt had begged him many, many times to get some sleep, but he wouldn’t listen as usual. Both the SPK and Matt had instantly thought that he was pushing himself beyond his brain capacity just to find Near as soon as possible. 

But they were wrong. It was partly right, but it wasn’t quite the whole reason why he was so desperate to stay awake. 

Mello looked worse than anyone in the investigation so far, but that didn't mean that all of their faces were permanently wrinkled with worry nowadays. It didn’t mean that their clothes always seemed to be wrinkled from sleeping in their clothes. And it definitely didn’t mean that all their eyes had permanent eye bags and had a diet that consisted of coffee, chocolate, and a lack of gaming.

Exactly seven days had passed since Near’s disappearance. Time was always key to investigations like this. The only problem was no one but God knew how much time there was, if there was even any left. All of the detectives knew that anything, absolutely anything can happen in seven days.

Hell, Mello knew for a fact that Near once solved a case that involved a little girl who was taken away from her family for two days. When she finally got returned, her little body was covered in so many bruises that she practically looked like a grape (Mello got a slap in the head for that one).

Four days ago, Mello wouldn’t dare leave a window open without making sure every strand of hair was in place. He wouldn’t even answer the damn door without unwrinkling his leather jacket much to Near’s annoyance. It’s not that he was vain - he just hated knowing that someone could be looking down on him.

Now? He looked horrible. His hair was matted, he had lost a few pounds, his leather was probably not the best clothes for an investigation, and the list went on and on and on. 

During the last four days, he had come to pity Steven and Halle. They were young and very good-looking, but anyone could see just by looking at them that they cared about their appearance as well. Even someone Anthony seemed to value cleanliness.

Not anymore. The truth is, they all weren’t taking care of themselves as well as they should. No one should reach that low of a mentality. Mello missed him. They all did. It just wasn’t the same.

Mello refused to stop working even when they assured him that they wouldn't stop until he woke up or came out of the shower. It’s not that he doubted them; Mello knew full well about all their capabilities. Nowadays, he’s come to believe that showers are a waste of time. And sleeping…

Mello refused to sleep. He absolutely did not want to sleep until he passed out from exhaustion. Because of the nightmares. 

The haunting nightmares. The first night he looked forward to going to sleep, as he wanted to be in top shape for the investigation. 

Then they started. Mello saw Near. He saw him in the most horrifying way possible. He saw the faceless kidnappers dancing around his lover, insanely smiling. Doing all sorts of harm to the small body beneath them. And Near was crying in a silent agony.

But the look Near gave him when he saw Mello watching was what horrified him the most. It was what made him wake up in a cold sweat. 

Mello was sure that it was the one time thing. Once he had managed to calm himself to sleep, it happened again, only it was different. The kidnappers were still faceless, and Near was still crying, only, it was a different form of torment. They were now burning his skin, making scars. But Near still made that same haunting look. 

It was a look of horror, and pitifulness. But it also had so much hurt, and malice, and rejection. And it was all directed at Mello. 

The next couple of nights consisted of the same dream, but it always had a different form of torture, whether it be whipping, or choking, or more beating, though it always ended in that same look.

On the fourth night, Near was free. He was walking barefoot to Mello’s extended arms. The grass beneath their feet was warm and soft. Behind him, was a soft glow of sunshine that gave him an angel-like appearance. His usual button down shirt was replaced with flowing white cloth. 

Mello had opened his arms wide and Near was in his arms again. When he finally pulled away, Near gently cupped his face and captured him in a light, but warm kiss. The kiss sent shivers down his spine with how gentle it was. Near pulled away again and gazed into Mello’s eyes lovingly. It was almost like a fairytale. 

Almost. 

Near’s tender smile faded. As if he was a different person, his eyes suddenly burned with malice. He gripped his lover’s cheeks so hard that it hurt. It seemed that his eyes had a tint of red as well.

“Mihael. Dear, sweet Mihael. Where are you now?”

Mello could feel the burning sensation of tears in his eyes. Near’s voice was an echoey whisper. 

“Mihael, you vowed it all to me, didn’t you? I vow to always protect you from all and any evil, you said, right? So where. Are. You. now?”

Mello couldn't speak. His mind was cursing the lump now formed in his throat.

“Why didn’t you find me, Mihael?”

Mello had woken up in a cold sweat. Tears were running down his eyes to his surprise. He had to take a moment to distinguish the dream world from reality.

From that day on, Mello decided he wouldn’t sleep. Not unless his body fails him.

Mello looked up tiredley from his work. Both the SPK and Matt were still working, typing away on one of the many screens in the house. Noting how tired each of them looked, he looked to another cold cup of coffee. Mello remembered the familiar situation of a cup of coffee that had run cold and grimaced at the memory of that night.

Mello’s head suddenly jerked up in surprise. The screen above him was on, as usual and the news was playing. The SPK and the ‘two L’s’ had learned that the most valuable things usually come up on there, whether it be evidence or a new case that interested them so it was on almost 24/7 at volume which one could hear. But that wasn’t what caught his attention at all. 

“Halle! Turn up screen #24, quickly!”

Mello was on his feet now, eagerly waiting for his request to be fulfilled. Within seconds, Halle had turned up the volume with her automatic reflexes. The other three men took off their headsets. 

The spokesperson was carrying a mic and speaking quickly. A warning was on the screen and she warned any viewer again before speaking.

“We have been warned that if the following tape is not played, then the unknown victim, the members of the police will be killed off one by one, and us news companies will be harmed. Also, the following content can be disturbing to young children, or anyone sensitive to disturbing content. This contains very, very alarming content. You have been warned.”

The program cut to a video that seemed to be filmed with an old-fashioned vintage video camera. It was static at first, then it faded and focused on a small person sitting on his heels. They seemed to be on the side of a fireplace. His back was dark from the flames on his side. 

The man behind the camera caressed the person’s hair in front of him. Then like a command, he said

“Turn.”

The voice made Mello shiver. A voice changer was being used to disguise it. 

When the smaller person hesitated, the hand caressing the hair stopped to roughly pull the man’s head back. Halle’s hand flew to her mouth. Anthony’s eyes widened. Steven turned away. Matt’s mouth dropped. 

Mello just stared. 

It showed enough light to see that the person was a man. It was enough to see that the victim had tape over their mouth. His hands tied behind his back. Purple bruises mocked the detectives. Out of millions of people there, a split second wasn’t enough to identify him, to see the wounds, or the pure fear on his face.

They were taught to see the things others couldn’t even if it was a split second.

They were taught to keep their emotions in check as detectives, so why?

Halle began to cry.

He had white hair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had a tummy ache while writing this :(


	10. 'Clients'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: This chapter contains mentions of fucked up content.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It might not have a lot of action compared to the last chapter, but it has a lot of meaning.

His whole body hurt.

He hated this. It made him want to vomit, to cry like a child for his mother. He hated being used. He hated being a toy for strangers and enemies. He hated the sound of the door opening to find yet another client. He hated the way the rope rubbed into his skin. He hated the feeling of dread and pain when they…

No. Never use that word even in your mind.

He absolutely hated himself. How did he let himself into this situation? If only he hadn’t been cocky and listened to his orders. Maybe he should’ve stood up for himself more and attempted to fight back. Either way, he is sure that there was a better option.

It would be heaven compared to...this.

Near knew the signs. Rod would send one of his men to come into the room, smiling like a stubborn cat. They would then drag him onto his unused legs, and lock him in a different room. It was cleaner, and it actually had a bed along with a side table, lamp, and closet.

He would be set on the bed and be threatened to not move or there would be consequences. Near didn’t doubt that for a second. He didn’t want to risk being hurt like that again. Of course, a part of him knew that even if he did exactly what they said and more, they would still harm him.

Why? For stress relieving stress or just the damn thrill.

But he didn’t want to think about that. His mind insisted that everything would be fine. Why wouldn’t it be? He was a genius and Mello would find him. He would survive.

Wouldn’t he?

Of course he would, he was a genius and Mello would find him.

He would?

Of course he would, he was a genius and Mello would-

Mello sure is taking his sweet time.

Of course, he’s finding every shred of evidence there is.

Even I know that isn’t much.

The SPK are probably working with him too.

All those people and they haven’t found me yet?

He’s working on it. He’s trying his best.

Sometimes ‘your best’ isn’t enough.

Clients were usually minor criminals, drug addicts, dealers, or even just random passersby from a sketchy street. Both genders came, though women were slightly more rare. They would come in the room and look at the slightly furnished room and then rest their eyes on him.

Their eyes would move up and down and Near would stare back, trying to scare him away. But a bunny never scares the lion. He would be sitting on the bed in a vulnerable position. He wasn’t tied up, because some clients don’t have a liking to bondage.

They then go to the closet on the left and turn the rusty handles. Out of all the clients Near has had, they all have one thing in common.

It’s their eyes. Their eyes always glint at the contents of the closet.

As far as Near can see, there are handcuffs, and rope. But he knows for a fact that there are a lot more. He’s had enough clients to know that. Some would bring their own supplies and some would come back for more. Regulars, he called them. Some would even take pictures or videos, sometimes both.

When Near was still new at it, he clearly remembered that he instantly had a bad feeling when a particular client reached up to the top shelf. Near remembered every single detail of what happened that night. He brought down the box and walked over to Near. The box had simple but pretty designs etched into it. Near would've taken some time to appreciate the simplicity, but he was preoccupied with something else.

What was this horrible, gnawing feeling in his heart?

Any normal person would always feel fear in this situation, but Near had learned to block out those feelings. Not completely, but it always helped quite a bit.

Maybe it was because he’d never seen the box before, and he wasn’t looking forward to the contents. But he’d seen this particular box before, hadn’t he?

That’s when it clicked. He definitely has seen it before. The client opened the box as if he was bragging.

Inside was a variety of knives, all different sizes.

Ah. So that’s where he saw it. It looked exactly like the murder weapon from a case a few months ago. When the client was finished with him, the white sheets were tainted with red.

Rod had punished him for making him replace the sheets, but Near knew better. Rod was amused. He was just giving him an excuse to hurt him again. This time, his arms were used to put out the Mafia's cigarettes.

The next client spared him a few glances before asking where Rod where the knives were. This led to Near having boiling water spilled on his arm later on that day.

It didn’t help that these particular people were regulars. It definitely didn’t help that it gave the rest of the clients to be more rough with him. It makes Near want to cry that Rod’s getting paid by making him suffer. He missed Mello.

Ever since then, Near hadn’t been able to block anything out. He has to bear through every single client without even a hint of distraction. Near was desperate, so he did something he knew he would regret but did it nonetheless.

Near began to pretend each of the clients were Mello.

It wasn’t hard at first, after all Mello was his first. He would take memories and replace them with his harsh reality.

It was only at the end of the day when Near realized what he was doing. He was using Mello, a memory of pure happiness, at will for his own selfish desires.

 _‘What else can I do? I’ll lose my will to live if I don’t change a thing’_ is what his mind told him. But Near knew deep down, that it was no excuse.

He hated himself. He wanted Mello to hold him in his arms again and whisper comforting words in his ear. He wanted the SPK to invite him to dinner, and eat Stephen’s homemade food. And God, he would kill for Matt to tell him one of his stupid jokes again. He missed them.

He wanted to go home.

It has been seven days since Rod took him away from his family.

At least that’s how long Near thinks it’s been. Every single fiber of his body is telling him that there’s no point in keeping track of time, but it’s the only thing keeping him sane. He will not let them win. His sanity is all he has at this point. He will be the victor, dead or alive.

Sometimes, Rod would make Near sit with them in a big room with all members of the Mafia, naked and tied. They would make him sit right next to the fireplace, and make fun of him.

They would torture him by talking hours on end about how pathetic he was. How disgusting he looked. How no one missed him at home.

If he were at home, Near would’ve made a snarky comment back, one that you couldn’t disagree with, but with this much insulting behavior, it does start to affect a person. Near was sensitive, and one shouldn’t have to go through this much torture, physically, mentally, and emotionally.

It’s hard to live knowing that you're breaking. It hurt so much.

From Rod’s point of view, Near’e eyes looked blank, like all life had been sucked out of them.  
And maybe it has.

That’s when Rod came up with an idea and decided to film a video and send it to the news company. Those lifeless eyes were amusing to him.

Perhaps they can finally get their intentions clear.

It has been a week since Near got here. He has counted at approximately 53 different faces in the slightly furnished room. His body is covered with bruises, cuts, and both dried and new blood. His body has been used too much. The Mafia beat him almost every other day.

Near woke up on the hard floor one day in pain. He was used to waking up with pain now, but today was different.

Usually it was his head and all over his body that he was sore, but he felt that and something else. Looking down at his stomach, he let his eyes focus on his stomach. It was bruised and battered but it looked different somehow.

Near was lucky that on this particular day, Rod hadn’t tied him up, so he was able to sit up and press on on part of his stomach.

Sitting up took longer than usual, as Near had a feeling he shouldn’t be moving around as much. But when he pressed down on his stomach, pain flew throughout his body like he was being shocked.

Tears subconsciously welled in his eyes. Why did it hurt so much?

Any normal person would assume that he was just very badly bruised from one of his previous beatings. But this was too different.

He thought

And thought

And thought.

And thou-

Wait. He knows what this is. He learned all about the human body at Wammy’s. But, if he was right…

No. No, he couldn’t be. Even he had to be wrong sometime. There was no way. He was going to see Mello again. He was going to eat dinner with his family. He was going to complain about Matt’s jokes.

He was going to see them one last time.

Near let out a sob. It echoed throughout the empty room, mocking him. He let out another one, and then another. Soon, he was cursing God about the unfairness in life.

Near did not stop. To be frank, he could not stop. Even when the metal door opened and Rod demanded he shut up. Even when Rod kicked his hurting body and screamed at him.

Even when he threatened to kill him.

Because on his stomach was a deep purple, the first sign of internal bleeding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The climax of the story....dun dun DUN.


	11. For Him

Damn it.

  
  


Damn it. 

  
  


“Damn it!” Mello brought his fist down on his current workspace. 

The rest of the SPK stared back at him silently. Halle’s eyes were swollen and red, but she still tried to keep it professional after breaking. 

It wasn’t just her. Everyone had been pushed too far and had their own reaction to that disgusting video. They also had their own way of dealing with it, though Halle’s was just the most noticeable. 

When Anthony’s eyes widened in pure shock, he had made a mistake. Police aren’t supposed to show emotion. 

When Stephen looked away from the video, he had made a mistake. Police aren’t supposed to look away from evidence even for a second, you could miss the slightest bit of evidence. 

When Halle’s hand flew to her mouth, she had made a mistake. Police aren’t supposed to make sudden movements, they show what you’re feeling. 

When Matt’s mouth dropped in absolute disbelief, he had made a mistake. Police aren’t supposed to show their true emotions.

  
  


And Mello…

  
  


He didn’t do a single thing wrong. That was the scary part. Witnessing that the person most emotional is acting perfectly.

He analyzed, he studied, and didn’t make a single emotion, not once.

It was ironic, actually. 

That Mello’s way of breaking was the way a detective, how L, should be. 

  
  


But… 

It felt wrong. So they watched instead. After the video, which they smartly recorded, they sat and watched. Mello looked up at the blank screen for a few seconds, then made a quick walk to the closest computer. 

That was when he slammed the table with his fist. Then, he sat down and started typing quickly, giving out to orders.

“Anthony, go to the News company and demand both the tapes and the copies. Threaten them if you need to. Stephen, find out the time, place, and when it was sent. Also, check social media, and ask around town. I want to see if the broadcast was actually fake and only sent towards us. Halle, go to the police station. Get them to confide their plans about what they're going to do about the video. Matt, stay here with me. I may need your help on things.” 

The addressed members stood in silence for a few seconds. That was it? That’s all he was going to say? No pity for Halle, no rage towards the kidnappers, nothing? Then, as if on cue, they split up going their own separate ways, and Matt staying with Mello.

Matt stood behind Mello awkwardly. 

“You want coffee?” he asked after a minute ticked by. 

“Yeah, I mean, no, no, I don’t, there's no time.” Mello stuttered without looking at him.

Matt sighed. The cat was going to have to be out of the bag sometime. His palms already sweating, Matt opened his mouth. 

“Mello”

Internally swearing at himself, he cleared his throat. Maybe he hadn’t heard him. Maybe he spoke to quietly

“Mello”

This time he knew for a fact Mello heard him. He was openly ignoring him. Matt was beginning to feel less tense, and more irritated. He knew that he was treading dangerous waters, but he needed to get this off his chest. This was for Mello’s sake, not his own.

“Mello!”

“What. The fuck. Do you want, Matt?”

Now, Matt knew that Mello was pissed off, but he didn’t know that he could snap by his name being called. 

Matt had a temper as well. Quite a big one, actually. He clearly remembered throwing a tantrum in a toy store for a shiny red car, a few months before his parents dropped him off to Wammys. He still has it to this day in fact. It sits in his own shiny red car. Perhaps he had a thing with cars when he was younger too.

The only difference between Mello’s temper and his was that Mello’s was like a wildfire. It goes out of control way faster than you would’ve liked, and ends up burning people he cares about. Matt can control his temper way better. He has a system that his parents taught him. 

_"Put your anger away, just for now. You can let it out later, when you help someone in need."_

It was a good lesson, and Matt used when other people got out of hand. Usually, he remembers the moral and calms himself down, resulting in a more peaceful argument. It has saved him plenty of times, and he uses his anger for Mello or Near’s behalf. 

  
  


Damn. 

He hasn’t said his name in a while, had he?

  
  


Matt spoke quickly.

“Woah, Mells, calm down. I just want to talk to you for a sec.”

Mello grunted in annoyance, signaling that he was listening, but still didn’t turn around. Matt was starting to feel as annoyed as Mello was. 

“Mello! I prefer to look at people when I’m talking to them. Please.”

“I would too, if I wanted to talk to them.”

Matt opened his mouth to make a rude retort back, but remembered to take deep breaths before speaking again. 

“Mello. This is kind of important. I need to talk about, well, everything.”  
  


“We can talk about everything when we find him again.”

Another retort? He really isn’t making this easy. They were both slowly losing their temper, though Matt was the first to see it. He wanted to take a step back desperately, but if this was how every day was going to be…

  
  


“Mello, you have to take care of yourself. How do you think we’re gonna find him if-”

Mello spun out of his chair, and held the collar of Matt’s shirt to his mouth.

“If what, Matt? I don’t care about the circumstances, I will find him. Do me a favor and know your place. Get to work.”  
  


Is fucking serious? Didn’t he know he was trying to help him? Now he’s treating him like dirt.

“Are you kidding me, Mello? Are we really about to get into this right now? I thought we were equals. Friends. And now you’re using your position against me to put me in my place? That’s fucking pathetic.”

Mello hesitated for a second before his expression hardened again.

“Maybe I would treat you like an equal if you didn’t fucking pity all the godamn time. Back at Wammys and now. What was it you said? Old habits really do die hard. Perhaps fucking fixing them would do you some good, Matt.” 

Mello was yelling now, his voice echoing through the hideout. Matt, all morals forgotten, was starting to raise his voice as well.

“Are you shitting me? How could you fucking say that? You’d be mental if you think I didn’t do shit for you. Tell me, who ran after you after you left the orphanage? Who joined the Mafia for your sake? Hell, who saved you from that fucking explosion when you blew it up yourself? And you say I pity you? That I’m not an equal to you?”

“Mello, I even came as fast as I could when you called! I would sacrifice anything for you or Near-”

Mello socked him in the face. 

  
  


“Don’t say his name, Matt” Mello whispers. “Just don’t.”

  
  


Matt, despite being given a chance to stop, had been pushed too far. His face didn’t even hurt. He began to yell again. 

“Mello, just the fact that you won’t allow people to say his name is weak! You can’t run away from something and attack head on at the same time. It just doesn’t work like that! You can’t run like a coward. How the hell do you think we can do this if you're not taking care of yourself? There is no way in hell we’re finding him this way. We mind as well give up now and let him die!”

At once, Matt knew he had said too much. Mello was shaking (with pure sadness or rage? Matt wasn’t sure which) and looking down at his leather boots, making his eyes invisible to anyone looking at him.

Mello knocked Matt to the ground. Sitting on top of him, Mello hit Matt’s face over and over again. But…

  
  


It didn’t hurt. Not one bit. 

  
  


Mello was sobbing, his tears falling on his friend. It was then Matt realized that he was hitting to hit, not to hurt. He was still holding back, he could feel it. He let Mello strike him again and again, until Mello’s hits became quite meek, and was crying more than hitting. 

Mello began to pound weakly on his chest, his sobbing turning to wails. Matt sat up and hugged his head into his chest, playing with his hair in a soothing motion. 

The hitting subsided, but Matt wasn’t finished with Mello yet. He wanted him to not hold back on his feelings, at least now. Now was the time to tell him. 

  
  


Whispering, Matt told him, “Let it out, Mells. For him.”

  
  


Mello’s eyes widened in Matt’s cream colored vest. It was useless, he would never let it out, for that was the job of L. He was doing this for Near’a sake, he had to be strong. 

But why, he wondered, did this hurt so much? It hurt so much more than crying. He knew that, and still, he would not let himself cry. 

  
  


_“For him.”_

  
  


No. Not now. Not ever.

  
  


_“I love you, Mihael.”_

  
  


Stop. Don’t think about him. Don’t show your emotions. 

  
  


_“Don’t thank me. I’ll always be here for you. I love you”_

  
  


Enough! It’s weak! Be like Near! Be like L!

  
  


_“I guess you’re rubbing off on me more than I thought.”_

  
  


Shut up. Shut up. I don’t want to cry. I don’t want to lose!

  
  


_“I love you, Mihael. I love you.”_

  
  


Mello cries, his voice echoing throughout the hideout. Mello curses at the kidnappers. The tape. The news. Himself. Near. God. Time. The emptiness. The whole wide world.

  
  


Mello breaks, the action long overdue. He cries until his voice is hoarse, and his eyes swollen.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


If one would walk in the room, they would find two men on the floor, cursing the unfairness of the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ever genuinely make yourself sad? yeah.


	12. Useless.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the moment you've all been waiting for.

Shortly after Matt and him got off the floor, Matt shoved Mello into the bathroom, saying that he didn’t expect anything less than a ‘cleaner version of him.' 

  


When Mello came out of the bathroom drying himself, the SPK was sitting at the small dining table. They, for once, did not have work sitting in front of them, in its place were steaming hot cups of coffee. The extra mug at an empty spot seemed to be for him, and that wasn’t all. 

  


There was a small bento at the chair. The SPK looked up and gave him sad smiles while Stephen motioned him to sit down. 

  


He had put on a baggy faded t-shirt, with loose black shorts. Mello sat down in front of the food, unsure of what to do. That’s when Matt came in, holding his mug, and smiling slightly and sat down with the others. 

  


“Go on, Mello. Halle made it for you.” 

  


Mello couldn’t look at them in the eye. He was so ashamed that he hadn’t found him yet. He should be working right now, and he didn’t think he deserved to be cooked for, as if he was part of their family. 

  


Halle put her hand over now Mello’s clenched fist. The touch soothed Mello and made him pick up the chopsticks. Breaking them in half, he once again hesitated. He  _ wasn’t  _ a part of this family. They could barely stand him showing signs of affection towards Near in the same room as them, so why now?

  


Anthony, who usually refused to speak unless addressed, spoke up.

  


“We’re worried about you.” 

  
  


_ Huh? _

  
  


“We’ve been noticing your work quality more rushed than usual.”

  
  


_ Rushed? What the hell does that mean? _

  
  


“Please eat. You are crucial to this investigation.”

  
  


After a few moments, Anthony added sadly. 

  
  


“It’s what Near would want.”

  


  


...What? Shocked, Mello looked up at him. Swallowing his pride, Mello struggled to keep his voice from cracking. 

  


“But... but how do you know...that he’s…?” 

  


Stephen’s gaze softened. 

  


“You know Mello, we’ve grown quite close to Near over the years.  It’s quite ridiculous how we act towards him now,” he said. A playful look appeared in his eyes. “Actually, before you two started seeing each other, you should have seen the way Halle forced vegetables down his throat.”

  


Halle snickered. “They’re healthy,” she said as she sighed in defeat. “Imagine. Someone like me spoon-feeding an 18-year-old man.”

  


Rester spoke, this time his voice directed towards Stephen. 

  


“Oh, I wouldn’t be talking Stephen. If I remember correctly, it was you who was lecturing Near about how he needed to pick up his Legos not too long ago.”

  


Stephen gave a dramatic gasp. “I stepped in one!”

  


Mello watched as they reminisced over many memories. A bittersweet feeling began to envelop his body as he watched them laugh for the first time in who knows how long. The SPK was right. He needed to eat, to rest, to take care of himself. That was why they stopped working in the first place - it was a ‘monkey see, monkey do’ trick. And it had worked. Annoyingly. 

  


In fact, Mello wouldn’t be surprised if Matt was the one who was behind this. Not that he would ask him any time soon. Perhaps, deep down, the SPK had grown some sort of liking towards Mello. They needed to. He and Near were going to get married after all. 

  


He turned his attention over to an empty chair and narrowed his eyes with determination. 

  


‘No, not were. We  _ are  _ gonna get married. I’ll bring him home if it’s the last thing I do.”

  
  


Mello ate the food in front of him 

  


_____________________________________________________________

  


Near opened his eyes slightly. A day without clients felt…odd. 

  


As if it wasn’t his doing to begin with. After the incident with Rod, Near did not tell him the situation with his body. 

  


Was it pride? Guilt? Hostility? Near didn’t know. 

  


Maybe he thought Rod would feel guilty if he died suddenly.

  


All Near knew was that he was going to die. Mello wasn’t coming. Probably making out with Matt, anyway. 

  


It was only an hour ago that Rod told him he had no clients. He probably sensed something was wrong. After all, he was sure Mello’s angry rants included how much of an emotionless robot he is. But what Near didn’t know was how long he would go on without clients. Days, weeks. It didn’t matter. 

  


Near continued to count the cracks on the wall. 

  
  


Mello wasn’t coming anyway. 

  


_____________________________________________________________

  


Rod talked it over with the group. No, not talked it over, he told them what he was going to do. They were willing to put a fight against it, saying it would give away their hideout, and cut the money in half. The nerve of them. 

  


Rod quickly let them know their place. Gun shells dropped to the floor - he was a useless member anyway. Picking up the old video camera, he walked towards the room of his victim. 

  
  


He was done waiting. That traitor was coming here for himself. 

  


______________________________________________________________

  


“Mello! Mello! Screen #24! Turn it up!”

  


Matt wasn’t usually one to get flustered or yell, so Mello’s head snapped up right away. The SPK members quickly dropped the papers they were holding and stood behind Mello in an instant. 

  


It was a strange feeling of Deja Vu - as this was exactly like the incident that happened a day before. Mello involuntary shivers and recalls the information that the SPK brought him only 30 minutes before.

  


Anthony had successfully got all copies of the tapes. It turns out that it was the only news building that ever got the tapes. That was a good sign - Mello did not want to deal with any other people handling the tape(s).

  


Halle had managed to get a decent amount of information about the polices’ plans. The investigation was to be looked into in secret, and the public was not allowed to know about it under any circumstances. Only the most trusted were put on the team. Luckily, Halle had managed to convince them to hold off on the investigation. 

  


Mello was relieved. The only that could be trusted was the people in the SPK: you never know what people were thinking. He also didn’t want to put people at risk, as they could get themselves killed and get in the way of  _ their  _ investigation.

  


Stephen had found out the date and time of the video, from the post office it was sent, and which mailbox it had been put in. He had also found another piece of evidence: the envelope in which the tape was sent, though it did not have any fingerprints on it. It was currently sent to a professional building to check if any remaining hairs or dust were on it. 

  


He had also checked on multiple social media sites, and it turned out the video had blown up, much to Mello’s disgrace. Already, rumors about the mysterious white-haired man and the sender were spiraling around the internet. It was clear that whoever didn’t see the program was aware of it now. Mello took it as a good sign that any copied version of the video was deleted instantly off of any social media site. 

  


Mello turns his attention back to the blaring screen in front of him. An almost identical warning came on as the last tape, which coincidentally, was the same woman as before. The only difference about the message was that she openly stated that this picture was connected to the previous video shown before.

  


Mello gritted his teeth. Damn them! He still thought that they were openly giving away this content for fame and money. But no one was stopping them, so why couldn’t they? He still didn’t have any evidence for that statement, as it wasn’t their first priority.

  


The thing that annoyed Mello the most, though, was the fact that the police weren’t even trying to stop them. And it was only because they gave in to the burning curiosity inside them. He couldn’t blame them, although that didn’t stop him from cursing at them whenever he could.

  
  


Disgusting creatures. 

  


Mello braced himself for the next part to happen. And it did. 

  
  


It was...absolutely revolting. 

  
  


The picture was this time a clear shot of the victim, clearing all suspicions and hope of a look-alike from the detectives’ minds. The screen showed Near as clear as day, this time not visibly tied up held down. There was no tape, or rope or anything, for the matter. 

  


In the background, and old television was set on the left, showing a cartoon that seemed to be mocking them. Near as positioned to the right of the TV, his eyes seemingly looking at the man behind the camera. Although one couldn’t be sure, he also seemed to be naked, as his shirt was off and his bottom half didn’t show. 

  


Mello squinted. This was not nearly as bad as the video, and yet…

  
  


Something about the picture sickened him to the soul. 

  
  


He tried to shake off the feeling cause look, he wasn’t struggling at all!

  
  


….Wasn’t struggling at all?

  


Why was he just sitting there? 

  


There was no sign of struggle, or hate or  _ anything _ .

  
  


And his eyes. They looked emotionless, no, that was wrong, they looked...dead. 

  
  


Mello let out a gag, as he fell to the floor. Retching, he managed to turn his head to take a look at the other members. Their eyes were still glued to the screen, because they  _ knew _ . 

  


It was too late. And the most frustrating part was that they knew exactly where to look now. 

  


The same old sickening hideout where Mello and Matt had called ‘home’.

  
  
  


  


  


  


After all, it was the same trick Mello himself used when he kidnapped Sayu Yagami years ago.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The stories almost finished! Only a couple more to go! Would you guys prefer the bad or good ending posted first?
> 
> Heyyy I'm backk!!!!! Missed me? Sorry i haven't been posting for so long! I took a tiny vacation so i could have better quality stories (and not get any more gray hairs) so I'll be posting a lot more these days! Yay! I'm in better spirits, can you tell? Please feel free to comment any constructive criticism so i can improve! 
> 
> On a different note, I'm taking requests soon! If you want you can comment them now, but I probably won't get into them before i finish this story. I hate not finishing what I start whoops. 
> 
> Until next time!! (⌒ω⌒).


	13. Weakness

It was time to go. Mello had put on his leather coat, handcuffs, and most importantly, his gun. He just hoped he wouldn’t have to use it. To be honest, he was disgusted with himself for stopping the urge to shoot  _ them  _ dead, but all he wanted was for Near to be ok, and unharmed. 

Although Mello knew it was a lost hope as all the detectives saw the horrible bruises, he still prayed that his injuries weren’t enough to push him over the edge. They already had his skin prickling with malice every time they thought about them. 

The fact that they knew who they were and never suspected them before was the most frustrating part. Even in his thought, Mello refused to say or even think of their names because he knew better than anyone else that he would pump so many bullets in them that they would be unrecognizable, and that thought disgusted him to the core. He hated himself for not being more like Near, calm and calculated, and was able to think way before he acted.

Even playing chess against Near annoyed Mello - it’s like he had planned his moves from the very beginning no matter how unpredictable he thought his moves were. But every once in a while, Mello would predict Near’s move for one turn and catch him off guard, making him have a surprised expression on his face for a millisecond. It was always worth it, no matter how hot-headed he felt to get up to that point. It felt like he was acknowledging him more than he needed to, and felt equal to Near. 

Even though Mello trusted him with his entire being, he couldn’t help but feel like Near was superior to him. He didn’t doubt it one bit when Near said otherwise, but he still felt that he was still the better one. He was just so...perfect. He did everything right, at the exact time you were supposed to. He was the one who was the successor, he was the one who started his life off right by making a group of trustworthy to help him with his investigation. He was humble, and yet knew how to use his capabilities to the fullest. 

And despite all this, Near chose Mello to be his companion and fiancee. He was imperfect, but the way Near looked at him made Mello go up to cloud 9, it was amazing. He would always doubt himself in the relationship as Near seemed to be the only one contributing, but knowing Near loved him was more than enough for both of them. 

  
  


He wouldn’t have said yes if it wasn’t.

  
  


Mello put on his leather gloves and left the room that contained the rest of his belongings that he brought from the house. Bringing a hand to his rosary, he mumbled a short prayer while fumbling with the silver trinket. Then he rushed out the door to meet with the SPK. 

____________________________________________________________________________

Mello opened a new chocolate bar.

Matt was just barely driving under the speed limit, however, the flashing lights had made it evident that it was an emergency. The SPK had decided to take multiple cars to create the illusion that their numbers were bigger and to have multiple escape methods if one were slit their tires. The downside was that they would all have to be separated, and that seemed to scare all of them. 

Just the thought of one having to stay behind if they had to run was terrifying. And they would be taking Near, who was probably in need of a hospital, too. And just the fact of his past ‘co-workers’ harming his loved one was also terrifying. Mello knew first hand what they could do. He just hoped that they didn’t push it too far. 

Tch. What the hell was he thinking? Of course they would push it too far, because ‘they’ were exactly like him! Always regretting your decision as soon as it’s done is what he had stupidly taught them. The worst part was that Near had been pulled into this because of him. 

If he hadn’t been so obsessed with beating him in the first place, he wouldn’t have even thought of engaging with those kinds of people to begin with. 

Mello shudders. What would happen if Near never genuinely liked Mello? Where the fuck would he be? Heck, where would he even go? Hell is where. He mind as well be a lost puppy without anything to guide him.

Matt and Mello were the only one sharing a car, which Mello thought was to have at least one secret weapon. That’s what he told himself anyway. He knew deep down that Matt was there to give him emotional support, and most of all to keep him in check, frankly because he was the only one who could handle him in these types of situations. 

Maybe Mello was relieved that someone would have his back at all times. Or maybe he was pissed because 1. Matt knew that he knew and still wasn’t telling him that he knew he knew and telling him things he didn’t know, and 2. The idea of being on a very  _ short  _ and  _ tight _ leash was pissing him off to no end and it fucking sucked. In a way, it felt like Matt was a bodyguard rather than a best friend, but he knew exactly why he (or they, Mello had no idea if the SPK was in on this) was taking these stupid pre-cautions and it was pissing him off that he understood because he didn’t want to understand. All he wanted was to take Near back home.

Mello wasn’t the only one who was worried. Obviously the SPK were worried about their... whatever they were to Near, but Matt had a lot on his plate as well. He would like to say it was the SPK's fault, but he knew their argument was too valid to argue with. Argh, why did he agree to that stupid deal anyway?! It was about 30 minutes before they were hastily packing their necessities when the all three members came up to him.

____________________________________________________________________________

_ Matt was just about ready, having his keys in his pocket and his gun and smoke bombs already somewhere he could access them easily. Picking up his duffel, he turned around to go through the door when he heard a knock at the door. Confused, he opened the door to see his superiors looking down on him. _

_ “May we come in?” Lidner said, her tone sharp as a razor. _

_ “Oh! Um, sure, okaaay! You're coming in anyway!” Matt said, his low social skills already making it clear that they were going to be an obstacle.  _

_ They looked at him and the large choice of guns that laid on his bedside, waiting to be put away. Matt, who was already starting to feel self conscious, decided to make small talk. After all, he was an ex-member of the Mafia, and what better way to make that more clear then to have a bed filled with guns (of many sizes, might he add) from the old hideout? _

_ “Sooo, are you ready to go yet?” he asked awkwardly. _

_ “We’ll just get right to the point,” Rester said, flat out ignoring the question. _

_ Matt cringed, as he contemplated taking that as a good or bad sign. Bad, definitely bad. Who in the right mind would take that as a good sign?! This. Is. So. Awkward.  _

_ “Mello is...very true to his feelings,” Gevanni started. “He thinks quickly, and has amazing reflexes, it’s perfect for the front lines. One of the main reasons why we were tempted to let him in this organization to begin with. Of course, being Near's finance made the list as well.” Stephen trailed off, visibly upset with the crack in the last syllable.  _

_ Lidner cleared her throat. “However, one of Mello’s weaknesses is that he can’t think, or keep a cool head. We know we’re in no position to talk in regards to... past incidents, but it’s one of the reasons why he wasn’t L’s successor.” _

_ Matt narrowed his eyes behind his goggles. Straightforward as always. But Near said himself that he would not be able to surpass L without Mello, so technically Near wasn’t chosen either. But what did Matt know? Dead men don’t speak. Where exactly was this going?  _

_ Gevanni spoke up again. “I - we were and are hired to protect Near with our life, but this is not regarding our jobs at all. Being part of Wammys, you should be able to see that he is irreplaceable to us.” Stephen looked down at the floor briefly, before looking at Matt again. “We want to ask you a favor.” _ _   
  
_

_ “We are aware that Mello has been improving on his snap level ever since he became close to Near. So of course he would snap if he was gone. It's a chainsaw reaction.” Lidner said in a matter-of-fact voice. “With Near gone, he breaks, he cracks, and loses the game. Facing the kidnappers, we have reasons to believe that something would trigger in his mind, something sadistic and impulsive and something that would hurt Near in the process, possibly killing him.” She paused to take a breath, then started again. “Say this were to happen, Mello’s on a killing spree with your past ‘co-workers’ while Near is being held at gunpoint. What do you suppose may happen then?” _

_ Gevanni, as if it were a scripted event, joined in on beat. “This is what we ask of you, for the sake of both Mello, Near, and yourself, Matt. You may have to-” _

_ Interrupting him, Rester spoke for the very first time in that conversation, which ironically, was the worst part of it.  _

  
  
  


_ “We want you to shoot Mello if that happens.” _

_ ____________________________________________________________________________ _

Matt grimaced, thanking his lucky stars that Mello was in the back seat polishing his rosary. Being Mello’s childhood friend, he knew for a fact that Mello would annoyingly notice right away if something was wrong. 

He knew the SPK didn’t mean to sound like he was supposed to shoot Mello  _ dead _ . That’s crazy! ...Or did they? Okay, now he knew he was just being paranoid. Right? Both of his best friends have always been better at reading people then him. It was just the idea of shooting Mello that made him shiver. It felt more like a  _ betrayal  _ and that scared him more than anything. 

  
  


Matt Jeevas would rather die than hurt Mello or Near. It just wouldn’t happen. 

  
  


The car braked, making a slight screech sound. They were here. 

The hideout they both knew so well. Mello got out of the car first, hesitation evident on his face as he stood beside the SPK members. Opening the bunker door that led underground led to a long, narrow and dim staircase. Looking back for confirmation, he took a deep breath and walked down the damp pathway. 

A long tattered couch was there to meet them, as were many silhouettes facing away from the group. A familiar looking fireplace was filled with burning flames, with a small television set put on a shelf. An old fashioned video camera was positioned beside the two items. As if on cue, all men turned around, revealing their faces easily. 

  
  


Dwight Gordan was there with a chilling grin.

  
  
  
  
  


Near was nowhere in sight. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter took...longer then planned sorry! I got MAJOR writers block, but I worked and killed my brain for more ideas lol. 
> 
> Anywho, I'm still taking requests so I'm very excited to see what you come up with! Please leave any constructive criticism in the comments! 
> 
> Next chapter will come out sooner then later since I actually have ideas.
> 
> See you soon! Mwah!  
> (ﾉ´ з `)ノ


	14. Games

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You know it's bad when your story's on the second page of the site.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shit really goes DOWN in this chapter.

“Where is he?” 

  
  


It was an order, a warning, yet no one on the other side was fazed. Rod put a finger to his lips, trying not to grin, but failing pathetically much to the SPK’s disgust. 

“Shhh.” 

Mello knew that if he didn’t bring Near out NOW, he was going to snap and ruin the whole investigation while putting other people's lives (namely his best friend and lover) at risk. He tried to take a deep breath to calm himself, but failed due to the lump in his throat. He managed to unclench his fists, one on his gun and the other empty, and relax his face to give the Mafia members a calmer sensation. 

Ha! His body wasn’t used to lying to himself and it definitely wasn’t going to stand down easily. Holding his breath, he was able to let out his voice without shaking, cracking, or giving too much of his emotions away. 

“Tell me where he is. Now.”

Looking back at the rest of the Mafia members, Rod gave them to the cue to laugh. It was the kind of laugh that infuriated the ones victimized to it and made you want to hurl your whole body weight on them and choke them until their stupid little necks broke. So yes, nobody blamed Mello for losing his calm demeanor right then. But that doesn’t mean they thought it was wrong. 

“Listen here, Dwight. You have five fucking seconds to bring him out right now. Because if you fail to do what I ask, you and I both know that my skills haven’t dulled over the years and I have every,  _ every  _ right to do so. Bring him out  _ now _ , before. You. Get. Hurt.”

Now, even Mello knew that threatening wasn’t the right way to get what you wanted, but at this point, Matt nor any of the SPK members were in the mood to bargain. They were all getting desperate, which led to them making more and more rash decisions. At this point, the mission was going to end up in failure.

But the way Rod looked at them dragged their attention off their minds. It was like his face was a light switch. One minute he was laughing like no tomorrow, and the next his expression changed to a stoic version of himself. Just the look in his eyes sent shivers down Mello’s spine. The way it changed so quickly was just... unsettling. Silence filled the room with tension.

  
  


They were insane. 

  
  


Absolutely insane. How the hell did they work with each other without Mello really seeing what was in front of him? No, why didn’t he? 

But he already knew.

Mello  _ chose  _ to turn a blind eye to Rod and the rest of the team because he didn’t want to see it. He wanted all of his decisions to be right to surpass Near. His rivalry blinded him and caused his deductive skills to be severed by at least 20%.

Goddammit! Why the fuck didn’t he listen to Near, to Roger, to L even?! Why did he have to be so stubborn and, and selfish to the whole world? Why didn’t he just stop and  _ listen _ for - for a minute? A second even!

Rod once again broke the silence, but not the tension, of the room.

  
  


“Be careful, Mello.” 

  
  


As he reached in his back pocket, the SPK tightened their grip on their guns as Rester screamed

“Don’t move, or we will be forced to shoot!”

Rod scoffed, as he made a hand motion of a cigarette with his fingers, and the other hand with his fist clenched and his thumb flicking up and down. Mello and Matt know better than anyone that he was a heavy smoker, as he was known for smoking in stressful situations. Mello clearly remembers him emptying a pack in an hour. But this time, he was just doing it for the hell of it, either to piss them off or put them on edge. 

And his little mind game was working. 

When Rod saw that they had no intention of letting him reach inside his pocket, he sighed heavily.

“Look, from your point of view, I’m sure you can see that there is no bulge in the pocket, which means there's no gun. It most definitely would’ve shown if it was a grenade and the only thing that can possibly not be showing is a lighter, and you can very much smell your surroundings - no gasoline. Besides, what’s the point of doing this if I’m just going to die?” he said rolling his eyes half sarcastically. 

When Rod was aware that none of them had any intention of putting their guns down, Mello saw how he turned just the slightest bit playful, something that only him and Matt caught. 

“Fine then. Pat me down.”

As he said this, he got up, stepped away from the group, as well as put his hands in the air. 

Mello could've sworn that Matt’s jaw had clenched because of Rod’s obvious attempts on this being a casual meet up. Mello gathered his thoughts.

_ ‘Stepping away from the group means he knows that he can’t pull any stupid moves. Rod knows full well about how talented the SPK members are, which is why I refused to let themselves get killed by them during the Kira case by a direct approach. He seems quite insistent on reaching into his pockets, so a pat down seems way too flexible. No, the more I think about, there’s no way that he’d allow us, his enemies, pat him down and receive close contact with his body. That would reveal if he had a gun or any suspicious items which we could arrest him immediately for. As for if he had the gun, that would mean we could easily take that from his grasp, without him even knowing…Yeah, this definitely has a second motive. He definitely wants to reveal what's in his pockets, but why?’ _

Mello opened his eyes. He let his arms fall to his side, now aiming the gun at the floor. 

“Alright, Rod. If you want a smoke so badly, I’ll let you. Think of it as your reward for cooperating” he said, almost spitting the words out.

Gevanni took a sharp intake of air, and said in a warning tone,

“Mello…”

Before Mello could even get the words out of his mouth, Matt intervened. 

“Don’t worry, Gevanni. He knows what he’s doing.”

Gevanni, well as the others, placed their eyes on the target once more, well aware of the dangers that Mello had allowed. Rod smirked with satisfaction, reaching into his pocket. He pulled out a red lighter first, and a small pack of cigarettes. But as he sat down again, Mello, Matt, as well the SPK members didn’t fail to notice another article that had fallen out of his pocket when he took his hands out. 

It was small, the size about a pinkie's length. It was heavy enough to make a small thud on the ground, and it caught all their attention right away. 

What was it?

It was...

It was…

  
  


It was. 

  
  
  


A finger. A small, petite finger.The inside of the nail dirty, covered with grime and who knows what. 

But. But they knew. They knew who’s it was.

  
  


Because the dirty, grimy, bloody finger had a ring on it. A wedding ring, and it was one that they had picked out so many months ago. It was so long ago. 

  
  


Mello snapped. He raised his arms again in single motion, the gun cocked, signaling it was ready for the next step. Matt reacts first. He always has.

It happened...so quick. Too quick.

  
  
  


“You know? I never really liked you. Not. One. Bit.”

  
  
  


His finger pushed it, and. And. 

  
  
  
  
  


And.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter is the beginning of the good ending! I had a really hard time with this one because I didn't know where to separate it to make it so it becomes different, if that makes sense. 
> 
> I do take requests, so feel free to leave them in the comments! I look forward to your ideas.
> 
> Well, I'll see you all again soon, mwah ( ´ ∀ `)ノ～ ♡


	15. (GOOD ENDING P1) Power

Blood dripped from his head. Dizziness echoed throughout his mind. 

And. And.

  
  
  
  


_ And Rod was still standing. _

  
  
  


Rod. 

Was. 

Still.

Standing. 

  
  


Not a speck of blood on his body. And the rest of the Mafia seem uninjured as well. And yet.

The right side of Mello’s head was moist with blood. 

Because. Because. 

  
  


Because Matt had shot him. Right in the middle of all his blood. Because Mello had been in the wrong. Rod wasn’t armed. He didn’t attack them. There wasn’t any proof that Near was there in the first place. The finger could just be a fake, or a completely different person all together. He failed. He wasn’t going to see Near ever again. Even his best friend knew that, and decided to end his misery before he screwed anything else up. Damn it. 

The SPK was right about him, as usual. No wonder they didn’t trust him with Near’s life - he couldn’t even look after his own temper. It nearly got them all arrested for killing an unarmed man without any evidence. There he goes again, putting people he loves in danger. That’s just how he is. 

That’s just how he is. 

  
  


No. No, he was wrong. That wasn’t it! Remember? He wouldn’t be here if he didn’t want to keep him safe! And, and those nightmares! That proves that he was thinking about him even when he slept!

He wasn’t going to die today. Analize. Focus. Something was off. Yeah, he should have been passed out from the bullet in his skull. He was still standing, and his shock had nothing to do with it. Just by touching the wound, Mello knew at once that it was too small. Instead, it felt more raw and sensitive. 

Matt did not shoot him. He was too kind. Instead, the bullet had skimmed past his head right before he made his shot, making Mello’s bullet go…

  
  


Only inches away from Rod’s head. About a milimeter to the left would have sent him to hell, without a doubt.. There was still a thin line of smoke from the shot. 

  
  


Heh. That was so like him. Always reaching for the passing point instead of exceeding the expectations of others. His lazy persona saved his life for once. How irritating. Though this wound was painful as fuck, it gave him a tremendous amount of satisfaction. It reminded him what it was like to be alive, to be hurt and bleed. He was alive, and that was his sign from God that no, his job wasn’t done yet. Near was alive. 

Mello felt calm. The most he’d ever felt in a long time. It was then he realized that he had been blocking out his emotions for what felt to be so long. Letting go made an odd sense of calmness wash over him like a wave. Near was alive.

Mello not only felt calm, but dangerous. Powerful. It was nice that he was actually agreeing with himself for once. He was thinking in a whole new light, it felt so good. Ah. So that’s where the dizziness came from. It was his power. They knew what he was capable of. They knew that he was able to fend for himself. 

  
  


They even knew how unnaturally calm he was being. 

  
  


That was when they acted. Within seconds, all the mafia members had at least one gun pointed at them. 

“Drop your weapons, or we will shoot.” said one of them.

Mello looked, really looked. And he saw. He saw how Near saw the world, just for a split second. It was a computer design mindset. Many calculations were going, showing their pulse, their weapon angle, but most importantly, what they were feeling. Mello saw. All of them panicked. They were thrown off their concentration slightly, and all their hands were slightly shaking. And that was what threw their shooting precision off, and he knew at once what to do. 

Mello held up a clenched fist, and his backup knew at once that it was a signal. They reacted quickly, and within seconds, all of them had a mask, which contained night vision goggles, on every one of their faces. It was then that Matt threw a smoke bomb. 

The thick essence filled the room. The masks did their jobs. Mello, no, Mernoria, had calculation and instincts running through his mind. The coughing. The movement. The vibrations. He felt it all. He was what Near and him were supposed to be in one. He could feel it surging through his veins, his heart beating wildly, as if Near was there himself. He heard the shooting of Matt and the SPk’s guns, shooting the Mafia’s weapons out from their grasps with ease. 

  
  


Mello felt a surge of electricity run up his spine. 

  
  


Turning around quickly, he heard Rod’s terrifying scream before he saw him, coming through the smoke, and was close enough to see Mello. They looked at each other in deep concentration, trying to figure out what the hell was going on in each other’s heads. Melo knew exactly what he was thinking. He could see it, his thoughts that were supposed to be kept secret. He saw what Rod imagined how his future would be now that his life was over. He saw how he remembered the past Mafia deeds, and how when Mello was working for them. He even saw Rod’s wife and daughter, whom he hadn’t seen for weeks, waiting in debt at their crappy apartment. But out of all that, Rod focused on the bad. Mello’s betrayal. The kidnapping. His seek for revenge. 

“Go on Boss. Shoot me! You’ve always been the toughest one here, right? So do it! Give me what I deserve for capturing whatever he is to you!” He screamed with a crazed smile on his lips.   
  


Mello looked. Didn’t he see it? The ring. His anger from before. The obvious look on Near’s face showed he was waiting for someone. There were so many signs that he had overlooked. He didn’t even see what was right in front of him. He had no idea about his obliviousness. He would never understand, and Rod knew that deep down. That was why he was begging him to be shot in the first place. Prison was the last place he wanted to be. 

Mello gently reached in his back pocket and pushed the handcuffs onto Rod, no, Dwight’s scarred hands. 

  
  


The smoke cleared. 

  
  
  
  


All of the Mafia members were all tackled and apprehended by the time they took off their masks. 

  
  
  
  


There was one room left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pleasure to see you again. This is p1 of the good ending! The next chapter should come out soon, so stay tuned!
> 
> Please leave any constructive criticism or request you have down below in the comments! I could use some, especially since my work can be rushed at times (--_--).
> 
> I really appreciate all of of your kind words, especially Kanby, who literally comments on every single chapter! I appreciate everything you all have to say about anything!
> 
> Please be aware that requests are done in order and I may not get to them as soon as you would like.


	16. (GOOD ENDING P2) Touch

One room left. Ten to fifteen men either on their stomachs or sitting up, all apprehended. 

The door was off to the left of where they were standing. It was metal, bolted and anyone looking at it could see it was quite thick. Very thick in fact. It was rusty, and the scrapes on the floor implied that it dragged across the floor, as it looked about a size too big for the doorway. 

Mello shivered. Maybe it was his mind, but he could swear he sees scratch marks from a person’s nails rather from the door. And if they were Near’s…

No. He was not going to think about that. Mello had finally gotten what he had wanted for so long, and yet he found himself thinking of just about every excuse there was out there. Of course, he was already furious at himself for even second-guessing himself at this point, because he was sure any other lover would be insane to even be hesitating when they sacrificed so much to be there. 

Damn it! Just open the goddamn door, Michael! 

Mello put his head in his hands. Fuck. Even when he felt a hand on his back, he still couldn’t bring himself to pull up his head, which suddenly felt so heavy. 

“Hey. Mells. It’s ok. Right now, we should be worried about whether the door is hooked up to some explosion or poison gas or whatever.” he says giving him a sad smile. “It would be bad if it ended that way, so we have to be careful, right?”

Mello hated sensing the guiltiness in both his eyes and his words and for once he was glad he was still looking away from his friend. Instead, he scanned the door briefly once again before sighing long and hard. 

“No, Matt. The scrapes look fresh and recently used. That tells us that they used it recently and were coming in and out of here for quite a while now.” Mello couldn’t help his voice from cracking in the last part. Who knew what they were doing to him? “Anyway, where are the others?”

“Still making sure that they got those psychopaths under control,” Matt said, bitterness seeping throw his teeth. “Yelling up a storm. The kicking is just plain irritating. Weirdly enough, Rod sat quietly through the whole procedure. Scary thing is, it doesn’t seem like he’s in shock.”

Mello managed to raise his head at that one. After his weird kick-ass spasm or whatever you wanted to call it, it was just gone. As soon as it was there, it just simply vanished. It felt similar to waking up after a long dream that you forget as soon as you wake up, but you know you definitely had it. 

The ‘thing’ hadn’t gone unnoticed by the SPK nor Matt, but they seemed to both understand and be completely confused by the turn of events. They unanimously agreed to keep quiet about, at least until the chaos was over. 

“So, while we’re waiting…” Matt started. They had all agreed to wait until they’re all grouped to keep them from dealing with new problems in smaller groups. Rester had volunteered to stay behind with the Mafia, although all could see that he was terrified about his son- ahem,  _ co-worker  _ not being there. Or any other worse outcomes.

“What is it, Matt?” 

Matt sighed. “I just wanted to say I am so, so sorry for shooting you. I...I didn’t know  _ what  _ I was thinking, but I did it, and I- god Mello, I know this is no excuse, but you’re capable of anything, and I just- that look in your eyes scared me so I just wanted to say that I’m-”   
  


Mello threw himself at his friend, wrapping his arms around his shaking shoulders.

  
  


____________________________________________________________________________

“Are you two ready?” Stephen said, gun still in hand. 

“The police were called just a few minutes ago, as well as an ambulance. They should be coming along shortly. Worst case scenario, we just drive to the hospital ourselves and leave them here to treat the others.” Halle said, eying the red cloth wrapped around Mello’s head wearily. 

Matt had given it to him after their awkward but heart-warming apology. ‘We don’t want to scare him right after we see him for the first time,’ he had said playfully. 

Mello nodded. This was it. The moment of truth was finally about to come. 

  
  


Tightening his hold on his own gun, Mello opened the door. 

____________________________________________________________________________

_ “Hold him still!” _

_ “Keep your eyes open for me, honey.” _

_ “Breathe, just breathe.” _

_ “You can do this, sweetie.” _

_ “I need you to focus on my voice, okay?” _

_ “We’re losing him!”  _

_ “Stay with us, sir. Stay with us!” _

  
  
  


_ “Sir, you have to get out  _ now _. We’ll take good care of him, we promise!” _

____________________________________________________________________________

Mello opened the door and immediately backed away in pure shock. 

  
  


There he was. 

  
  


Running up to the crumpled heap in the corner, Mello could already see that the Near he knew was nowhere to be found.

He was covered from head to toe in bruises and cuts, some recently opened. Small burn marks were all over his right arm, the circular shape telling them that it was from cigarettes, and a tattered and smelly blanket was thrown carelessly around his body. A gag was in his mouth, along with a blindfold that was tied around his head. His white hair was covered in dirt and other unknown filth, with so many tangles in it that it looked nothing like that man whose emotions were always kept in check. And his stomach...

His small body was shaking. The man had turned into a small child and was now sobbing softly into his gag. Mello reached out and lightly touched the tear-stained face of his lover, and he gasped quietly when Near did not accept his touch, and instead flinched away from him.

Like he was the monster he feared. 

Halle and Stephen were in shock and their eyes began to fill with tears. Matt was already taking off his goggles to wipe his moist eyes. 

Mello was now afraid to get the touch he yearned for.

Wiping his eyes again, he said 

“Anthony. We found him.”

____________________________________________________________________________

“Sir, you have to get out  _ now _ . We’ll take good care of him, we promise.”

“No, I need to be there with him now! He needs me, don’t you see?!”

“Sir, if you fight anymore we’re going to need to call security!”

It wasn’t just him. No, this wasn’t just him anymore. All of them were fighting to be with Near, whether it was yelling or pushing. The nurses were struggling to keep all of them in control, even Halle. 

It was, in fact, internal bleeding that was happening. Near was in critical condition, and his chance of survival wasn’t great. Near had always been co-dependent, but they had no idea. All of them were stupid. They were the police, they were  _ L  _ for crying out loud! 

  
  


Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!

At last, the doctor came out. The ruckus stopped in an instant.

  
  


He sighed.

“Mr. River is going to have to undergo a risky surgery if he wants a chance. All you can do now is wait. Do I have your permission to risk such changes? We don’t have a lot of time”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, turns out there's has to be another part for the good ending. It was just too long lol. I kiiiinda might have to delay the next chapter if school messes up with my schedule (ᗒᗣᗕ)՞. Ugh, I hate school. 
> 
> Anyway, I'll try my best to keep myself writing a bit every day (who am I kidding. I can't even sit still for thirty seconds)! Please comment any requests or constructive criticism! 
> 
> Also, I'm sorry for not getting to my old requests sooner!


	17. (GOOD ENDING P3) Who...?

An old fashioned clock ticks. A baby cries in the corner. A weeping couple caresses their child on the other side of the room. 

Mello taps his leather boot almost painfully against the chair’s leg. Opening a new chocolate bar, he looks at the clock again.

It has been almost three hours since Near was admitted into surgery. 

Matt was pacing around the waiting room chewing on his thumb. Gevanni was sipping his lukewarm coffee that they got almost an hour earlier. Rester was sitting in a chair, with almost a blank look on his face. And Lidner? She was demanding answers for the 50th time at the doctors, in an almost threatening way. 

Mello couldn’t blame her. Ever since Near got admitted, all they were saying was that he was being ‘worked on’. What the hell did that mean? Was he ok? Was he stable? Is the surgery done? Was he alive? Nothing! No answers, no matter how hard they pressed, nor begged, or annoyed the poor employees, they always came back to the same waiting room with nothing. 

It was so frustrating to get denied every time with their badgering. Ever since they became part of the police, they were able to get answers from complete strangers in hours, but this? This seemed like they were back to being like Touta Matsuda. 

A complete rookie and a dumbass.

Lidner walked back to the group, her face unsurprisingly more frustrated than when she left. Mello couldn’t help wondering if this is what parents would do. It seemed quite parently. He doubted they would do this for just anyone unless it was a loved one, a friend, or a family member. A loved one? Hardly, that was  _ not _ the case, that was  _ Mello’s _ job and his alone. A friend? Ha! He wasn’t stupid. Near’s only friend was Matt, and none of them would be dumb enough to say that the SPK was Near’s  _ friends _ .

...Family? They weren’t blood, but what did that even mean?  _ His _ blood parents abandoned him when he was seven, and he never shared any pity about them ever since. It was their choice. But adopting was always an option, and you never hear a parent whose child wasn’t their blood saying “This is my adoptive child” do you? Maybe it was unspoken that they were, but not official. 

Forget it. Mello was just confusing himself at this point. Let’s just say that they’re his unspoken guardians. That works. Weirdly well. 

  
  


Mello was suddenly brought out from his thoughts. 

An announcement was suddenly played. Nurses and doctors suddenly dropped whatever they were doing and suddenly rushed out of the room. All gathered to a single room, down in the emergency door. 

Mello’s breath hitched. The rest of the group paled. Mello almost ran up to the reception desk again and almost started yelling.

“Near Lawlight. What the fuck is happening in there.”

The woman shook her head. 

“I’m sorry sir, but there’s no news about him your just gonna have to-”

Mello slammed his fist down in the table. 

“No! I’m done waiting. The announcements that just played. Someone’s heart just stopped, didn’t they? Who was it?”

The receptionist shivered. “Sir, I can’t-”

“Answer the goddamned question! Did someone’s heart just stop?!”

Tears welled up in her eyes. “Please, sir, I just-”

“Who was it?! Was it Near?! Answer!”

The tears spilled.

“Okay! Okay! You’re right, but they’re working on him right now! Please calm down sir!”

  
  


Mello’s eyes widened. It seemed like the whole world went quiet. Turning around slowly, he saw that both Matt and the SPK had heard the entire conversation.

They knew. 

  
  


Mello’s legs gave out. 

  
  


His tears spilled. 

____________________________________________________________________________

Near woke up. He was warm. He felt light. 

He was okay. 

He opened his mouth to call for someone.

  
  


...But who was he looking for?

  
  


Confusion crossed his features. He was in a hospital bed. He had just gotten out of surgery. He was okay. But why was he here? For something, but what? 

The bed was comfy. It was nice.

He looked at his arms. They were scarless, not a bruise in sight. 

Good. At least he wasn’t that hurt. 

Near looked up. He wasn’t surprised when someone walked towards him. Should he be? He was expecting someone, after all. He walked to the hospital bed and sat at Near’s feet. He spoke.

" .... --- .-- .- .-. . -.-- --- ..- ..-. . . .-.. .. -. --. ..--.. "

“I feel fine, I’m a bit confused though. Can you help me?”

" ... ..- .-. . .-.-.- "

“Why can’t I remember anything?”

" - .... . -- . -.. .. -.-. .- - .. --- -. .. ... -.- .. -.-. -.- .. -. --. .. -. .-.-.- -.-- --- ..- ... .... --- ..- .-.. -.. -... . ..-. .. -. . .- ..-. - . .-. .- .-- .... .. .-.. . .-.-.- "

“Ah, that explains it. Thank you.”

The figure nodded and looked out a window. Near looked too. It was open, and it let in a cool breeze that tickled Near’s face. It was nice. The sun was out too, casting a warm glow on his face. It looked perfect. 

“Hey.”

The figure turned his attention back to him. 

“Who are you?”

____________________________________________________________________________

_ “Clear.” _

_ An electric shock went through his body. _

_ ____________________________________________________________________________ _

“...”

“Are you dangerous?”

“...”

“Do you want to hurt me?”

“...”

“Do you have business with me?”

The figure perked up and immediately nodded.

“Oh, I see. You can’t answer any of those questions, right?”

" -.-- --- ..- ' .-. . .- ... -- .- .-. - --- -. . "

“Thank you. I have a feeling that’s what I’m known for.”

____________________________________________________________________________

_ “Clear.” _

_ Nothing. They were losing hope. _

____________________________________________________________________________

“When do I start to remember something?”

" -. --- - ..-. --- .-. .- ...- . .-. -.-- .-.. --- -. --. - .. -- . "

“Oh. I was really hoping for a set time, though.”

The figure looked uncomfortable. 

“...................................................................................”

" .. -.. --- -. ' - - .... .. -. -.- - .... . -.-- ' .-. . --. --- -. -. .- -.-. --- -- . .-.-.- .-.-.- .-.-.- "

Near’s eyes widened. 

“What? What do you mean?”

He held up his hand to silence him. 

" -. --- --- -. . ' ... -.-. --- -- .. -. -- .-.-.- . .. - ' ... .--- ..- ... - ..- ... -. --- .-- .-.-.- "

!!!

“No one…? Are you sure…?”

The figure held out his hand.

" .--- ..- ... - -.-. --- -- . .-- .. - .... -- . .-.-.- .. ' .-.. .-.. . ... -.-. --- .-. - -.-- --- ..- - --- ... --- -- . .-- .... . .-. . -. .. -.-. . .-. .-.-.- "

Near looked at his hand. It looked so welcoming. But…

“I can’t.”

The figure looked surprised. 

“I’m sorry, but I don’t like knowing what’s on the other side. What if someone’s waiting for me?”

" -.-- --- ..- .-- --- -. ' - -... . .- -... .-.. . - --- -.-. --- -- . -... .- -.-. -.- .-.-.- "

“I know...but I need to try.”

The figure slowly pulled his hand away. 

“" .. --. ..- . ... ... -.-- --- ..- .--. .- ... ... . -.. .-.-.- --. --- --- -.. .--- --- -... --..-- -. .- - . "

He put his hand over Near’s eyes. 

Near looked through the gap between his fingers. 

  
  
  


L smiled kindly back at him. 

____________________________________________________________________________

_ “Clear.” _

____________________________________________________________________________

Near woke up. 

  
  
  
  


Five people stared back in shock.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok guys, I'm leaving this one up to you, do ya'll want the aftermath? Or should I finally start on the bad ending? I'm okay with either, I just don't want you to think that I'm dragging this one out?
> 
> Thank you for reading! I do take requests, so please them in the comments. Mwah! (^人<)〜☆


	18. (GOOD ENDING END) Slowly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> its.......finally.........done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this took me DAYS to write.

Near was awake. 

  
  


Near was  _ awake _ . How many times has he dreamed of this moment? Has he rehearsed what he was going to say, what he was going to do? 

Why are things all going blank at this moment, the one that he's waited for most?

____________________________________________________________________________

The lights were too bright. So much so, that it hurt. 

In fact, everything hurt. But in his dream, everything was perfect. 

Was he  _ supposed _ to go with the man sitting at the foot at his bed? Was he still there now?

  
  


He looked, immediately regretting it because his head felt like it was going to explode. 

One...two...three...four…five.

  
  


Five people. He liked that number

____________________________________________________________________________

He ran up to him, his companions immediately steps immediately coming behind him. He was here. Going on one knee, he grabbed one of his hands, one only four fingers, and looks into his lover’s eyes. 

They look blank, they look hurt, they look empty. 

It makes Mello scared to look in his eyes, but he looks anyway because the boy  _ needs _ him. 

  
  


“Near, baby, I’m here. You’re okay.”

____________________________________________________________________________

He doesn’t know what he wants to say, what he  _ needs _ to because he’s so tired. 

  
  


“Mello, you’re all the real thing, right?”

“We all are. Rest now, Near.”

____________________________________________________________________________

The next time Near wakes up, he’s alone with the SPK. Anthony is holding his hand, Stephen’s hand is resting on his leg, and Halle is brushing strands of his white hair from his forehead. 

Near opens his mouth, but his throat is dry and Stephen is immediately at his side with a glass of water. Sipping awkwardly, he feels embarrassed because water is running down the sides of his mouth like a child who can’t be fed. 

They don’t seem bothered, only smiling fondly at him like he was their own child. 

____________________________________________________________________________

The next time he wakes up is when the doctor is talking to all five of them, the doctor looks at him and Near strains to read her name tag. Naomi, her name is. And she talks quietly to him and says that he’s fine, and it’s normal to feel confused and lost, but it was okay because he’s been through a lot and doesn’t need to worry about anything. 

Near has to give her the credit, because that’s exactly how he was feeling - lost and confused. He had no idea how long he’s been here. He doesn’t even know how long it’s been since he last woke up. Everything feels woozy and annoying because Near doesn’t know anything.

He worries how long he can keep this up. 

____________________________________________________________________________

Matt is the only one here this time, just staring at a blank screen on his switch. He immediately notices that he’s being watched, and his eyebrows pop up in surprise. 

“Near! Hey, it’s fine, it’s just me. No, no, don’t try to get up cause the doctor told you not to, remember? The others are just getting something to eat and should be right back. Are you okay? Do you need anything?

Near just listen because obviously Matt isn’t done talking. Listening to his voice is soothing, and it feels like he hasn’t heard it in so long. 

And maybe he hasn’t.

____________________________________________________________________________

Near’s had enough. When he wakes up again, their all sleeping uncomfortably in chairs and he wants to get up and give them the bed. 

Sitting up slowly, he ignores the pain in his head and moves, because he wants to touch them and go home. Grunting quietly, he uses his elbows to prop him up and almost passes out again when ringing goes through his ears. As if they can hear it themselves, all of their eyes flutter open and quickly assess the situation.

They look in wonder because they were told that he wasn’t going to be able to move for at least a month.

They called the doctor.

____________________________________________________________________________

“I don’t want it,” Near said bluntly.

“Well that’s too bad because it’s right here, it’s warm, and you haven’t eaten anything in weeks,” Mello said, annoyance clear on his face.

“I don’t care. I don’t want fucking lukewarm hospital soup with those things that they call vegetables,” he said, once again turning his face away.

“Hey,” Stephen said warningly. “Watch your mouth.”

“I don’t know Mells, he has a point,” Matt says coming into the room with a soda. “The food is borderline poison.”

“Well, either way, you’re going to eat. Or else I’ll get Halle to feed you.” Anthoney said an easy smile on his face.

Narrowing his eyes at the older man, Near hissed “You wouldn’t.”

“Oh, he would,” Halle said, setting groceries on the floor. “Give me the bowl, Mello.”

Near scowled. “I’m not a child, and I don’t want this crappy broth. I want solid food.”

Halle scowled right back and said “Well, tough luck hotshot, because your stomach isn’t ready for that yet. Make do. Now say ‘ah’! And watch your mouth, young man.”

____________________________________________________________________________

Near woke up in a cold sweat, the heart rate machine going off.

It was as if he couldn’t control his breathing and the machine sent out an emergency warning to the doctors. The SPK tried to calm him, but it was impossible. The dream had just felt too real. 

“He’s hyperventilating,” Naomi yelled. “Give him the sedative!”

____________________________________________________________________________

“Another one?” Mello said in the morning.

Near looked away, almost in shame. It was the third one this week. Mello sighed. This was worrying. The thing is, he couldn’t help at all with the panic attacks unless he called the doctor. Sedatives were a thing you shouldn’t rely on. 

Mello felt helpless. He hated seeing his lover in pain. When the others left, Mello curled up next to Near and rubbed comforting circles on his back. 

____________________________________________________________________________

Near watches the news with his family. Apparently, he’s all over social media much to his distaste. Luckily, Matt had managed to hack into popular programs and convince everyone it was just a practical joke a few teenagers pulled. 

Near was glad. The last thing he needed was news reporters putting his face on every single fucking screen there was out there. 

____________________________________________________________________________

Homecoming. 

Finally. Near did have to go home in a wheelchair, but at least he could sleep beside Mello again. He had no idea how many hardships he would have to face there. 

____________________________________________________________________________

Mello woke up in fear. 

“Near? Near! What’s wrong? Wake up baby, please wake up!”

Near was hyperventilating in his sleep. This has never happened before, not even in the hospital. The smaller boy’s forehead was beaded with sweat, and he was gripping the blankets so much that his knuckles were white.

Mello tried shaking him, everything was going unnoticed to him.

“Fuck. Fuck,  _ please _ Near! Please, please, please wake up.”

Mello was yelling now, quickly cradling Near’s head in his arms. Near was almost pulling his own hair out of his roots, and Mello couldn’t get him to stop. 

“God, please. Please don’t take him away from me, he’s only just come home. Let him wake up, I’ll do anything, just don’t let him die when he just got home.”

  
  


Near’s eyes shot open, bloodshot. Immediately clinging to Mello, he began to wail, because even Mello couldn’t protect him in his nightmares.

____________________________________________________________________________

“Is he okay? Did you call the hospital?”

Mello rubbed his tired eyes.

“No, I didn’t. I just woke up to see him clawing at his hair. Halle, it was the scariest moment of my life.”

“How long was he going on for?”

“Um, I can’t say for sure. Let’s say, a bit more than two minutes? I was really freaked out. It took about half an hour for him to calm down, so he’s asleep right now.”

“Would you be more comfortable if we came over?” Halle said softly.

Mello looked back to the bedroom’s closed door. 

“We’ll be okay for tonight. I need to learn how to deal with these things after all.”   
  


____________________________________________________________________________

“What’s this, Matt?” Near said, noticeably tired.    
  


“It’s a finger! Well, like kinda. I made sure it wouldn’t rust!”

It was made of metal, and it was in different sections so that it could bend in different ways. The bottom was made with a soft material so it wouldn’t scratch at your skin.

Near squinted. Of course, he  _ knew _ that he now only had nine fingers, but he’d already given up on ever having ten again. Matt had surprised him once again. 

“Let me try it.”

____________________________________________________________________________

Near had somehow got lost at the mall when he was looking at a coat for a few minutes too long. He didn’t worry at first: after all, Mello wasn’t one to leave him wandering around for hours at a time, so Near decided to explore for a bit on his own.

Mello, on the other hand, was terrified. He had somehow lost track of Near when he was rushing around from place to place. Normally, he wouldn’t be scared and would just meet him back at the car when he was tired of the bustling people, but Near had  _ just _ gotten out of the hospital for God's sake! Naomi had specifically told him not to leave him alone as that could trigger a panic-inducing response in his consciousness resulting in a panic attack in public. 

She had also told him to introduce him to strangers a little at a time. For example, the supermarket first, moving on to schools, and finally the mall. Mello was already sweating. He needed to find him fast. Godammit, why did his phone have to be dead now?

  
  


Near was looking at food in the food court, one of the busiest places in all of the buildings. When someone bumped into him from behind when he began to feel quite...trapped. A familiar ringing went through his ears, and he started to yearn for Mello’s touch again. 

But... all of the endless stores were dizzying to Near and he wanted to go home. 

When they finally ran into each other in the place that they lost each other, Near was feeling feverish in the embrace. 

____________________________________________________________________________

Slowly. 

Slowly, slowly, Near was starting to adapt.

Everything was all right. 

He would be okay. 

____________________________________________________________________________

“Hey, Near?”

“Yes, Mello?”

Near was sitting at their dining table, typing on his laptop. As long as his headaches and exhaustion didn’t get in the way, the doctor said he was allowed to work as much as he wanted. This was a new experience for him. Not only was he only allowed to work for a couple each day, but he had to re-learn how to type with the new finger.

Matt had made it so it fits snug, but it was a bit heavy then what he was used to. Still, he wasn’t complaining. Learning had always been his strong suit, and he refused to let that get in his way. Besides, he found that a lot of his paths have been cut off ever since he came back. Everything he wanted, or previously wanted to do, had been put off by his doctor’s appointments, or tiredness, or nausea. 

“So you know how we missed the wedding?”

Near felt a pang of guilt. No matter how much anyone told him it wasn’t his fault, he always couldn’t help feeling that all,  _ all _ of their hard work was put to waste. All that money, done the drain. Gone.

And he couldn’t even help them. 

“...I do.”

Mello fiddled with his fingers. 

“So, I was wondering...when I propose to you again, do you want the old ring, or a new one?”

Near stopped typing immediately. Was he saying he was willing to pry a bloody dirty engagement ring off his severed finger?

  
  


...Did he want that?

  
  


Would it really,  _ really _ be a good idea to hold on to something happy that has now been tainted? But what if  _ Mello _ wanted to? For nostalgia, for the memories, for anything at all? Right now, Near wanted nothing to do with it. He wanted to forget everything that happened during the kidnapping. But did he have a right to say so?   
  


“Mello, just because I got kidnapped, does not mean the proposal didn’t happen.” Near said, keeping his cool.

“I know that! I just… you know.”

Yes, he did. He knew exactly what he meant. 

“I don’t know.”

Mello’s expression hardened in an instant. 

“Don’t give me that. Tell me the truth, Near.”

Near sighed. Even he couldn’t tell if this was a good or bad idea.

“I don’t think I would feel comfortable with the old ring on my finger…” he said, his eyes shifting to his fingers, then his laptop again. 

Mello looked at him for a few seconds in shock. Then he started to laugh. 

“Oh god, you started so formal, Nate! Do you really think I’d leave you over something that’s merely an object? We don’t even need a ring to be engaged!”

Near’s expression relaxed. Mello never ceases to amaze him. It wasn’t just that though. They’ve both been noticeably affectionate with each other and called each other by their names more frequently. The SPK had gotten even more parent-like, and always insisted on coming over at least every other week.

“Good then. When we become better financially, you may buy me a new ring.”

Mello’s laughing face turned into something else. More soft, and less obnoxious. He reached into the right leg of his jeans, and pulled out something red and square. It was then Near noticed that Mello was wearing his good leather coat, one that was only worn during special occasions. 

Opening the box with one hand and holding it in the other, Mihael watched as tears formed in his lover’s eyes and said

“If you think that finances will stop me from making you happy, think again. Will you marry me, Nate?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> y'all want the bad ending? or do you like it the way it is?

**Author's Note:**

> i love flufff. meronia marriage is a yes for me.


End file.
